Dragon on the carpet

Posted on by Sarah A. Hoyt

There will be Dark Fate 5 in a couple of hours. Until then, I thought you might want to read this.

davefreer's avatarMad Genius Club

A little parable for you: Once upon a time, some Bavarian beer fanciers set up a beer-fest in field outside their small town. Now, because nothing goes quite so well with good beer as good smoked and cured pork, soon there were people providing the same, and happy buxom lasses serving beer, eisbein, various pork sausages and ham. Then there was an oom-pah band. Everyone had a great time, and the festival grew, people came from far and wide, and stall-holders made money.

A carpet seller saw the success and set up a stall in the corner. Now he came from a Muslim country, and didn’t drink alcohol, or eat pork. But people felt a little sorry for him and he did some good business. And some of his carpets were rather nice. It would be intolerant to be nasty and some diversity was good, Ja. The next year there…

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28 thoughts on “Dragon on the carpet”

  1. Peter’s done pretty well with his own variations on beer and pork, for which we thank the readers who enjoy it!

    And hey, that one stall with the Portagee who sells awesome food, but occasionally throws carp? She’s awesome, and as long as I’m not the one getting hit, it’s great entertainment!

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        1. Port? Oh my, yes. Regarding Sandeman’s I have found Founder’s Reserve is quite enjoyable.

          Excuse me while I pour myself some to have with a few crackers and a bit of cheese on the side — and retreat to my wing chair by the fire to read.

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          1. The liquor store in the next (incorporated) town over had Sandeman’s Tawny, Rose, and Founder’s Reserve. I was in a good mood and got the set as it were. All things considered, the Founder’s Reserve is likely what I’ll stick with assuming I can get it. It’s certainly worth the slight increase in price.

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            1. Looks up from reading. … I agree, there is a greater depth and roundness to the flavor. … Takes a sip of port and goes back to reading.

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      2. With the cats and dragons that desire seems quite explainable – most of us like being tossed a treat from time to time, but I do believe that Wallabies are herbivores, therefore that doesn’t explain everyone here.

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        1. Well, if all goes well the Cat Who Types Like a Writer will have a release next week (Colplatschki series, FWIW). Try the oven-roasted potatoes (white and sweet) with balsamic apple vinegar. I also have sweet-potato fries with maple drizzle.

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          1. The dishes sound interesting. The last couple of years I have been developing a greater appreciation for sweet potatoes…just so as long as they are not loaded with sugar and mini-marshmallows. Balsamic apple vinegar? This is a new thing to me.

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        2. I have it on good authority (American Indian Legend) that rotting carp included at planting time helps one produce more corn.

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          1. I have experimental evidence from my youth that this works. Although I was not using carp per se (freshwater fishing took an (expensive) license, salt was free under 18) they were sea robins and other “junk” salt fish. I say “junk” as if you catch a big enough sea robin they are referred to as monkfish and are quite desirable (if you know how to clean the nasty spiny things). Al trying to clean a 3/4 lb sea robin is going to get you is 2 little 1 oz fillets and likely a bunch of cuts prone to cause blood poisoning due to the spines and mucus on the darn things. But they grew nice corn…

            Allegedly this knowledge was part of what Massasoit and his people taught the Pilgrims that made the harvest so good that a a day of thanksgiving was proclaimed. That seems to be utterly apocryphal, but hey its a nice story and I’m sticking to it :-).

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            1. That must be what Anne McCaffrey based the Packtail fish on in DragonSong. The description is:

              “An ugly fish, with sharp spines all over, it oozed an oily slime that ate into the flesh of your hands and made the skin peel off. Packtails were more head and mouth than anything else but hack the front end off and the rounded, blunt tail could be sliced off the backbone.”

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      3. There is a fish stand in the Pike Place Market in Seattle famous for their fish-flinging employees. Tourists stand around in large herds, cameras at the ready, just in case they get to see an airborne piscine. And because said employees are Silly People, they have a very realistic fish pillow they sometimes *actually* throw into the crowd to elicit shrieks and giggles.

        So yes, there are people who want fish thrown at them. It’s a funny old world. :D

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      1. Next there will probably be a SJW ranting about an Uber driver having a Hawaiian bobble doll on the dash….
        Oh wait, there already is, and she committed the gravest of SJW microaggressions of asking his ‘race’.

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  3. Don’t forget the fact that the Dragon Awards will introduce DragonCon’s many fans to exciting quality fiction.
    There used to be a guy in the 40’s that thought the same way; I believe his name was Hugo Gernsback.

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    1. ::Raised Dragon Eyebrow::

      Really!

      I have you know that my Dragon Cave has wall-to-wall carpeting (except for the kitchen and bathroom).

      Next, you’ll be telling me that Dragons and Books don’t mix. :twisted:

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  5. Thanks for the link. Congrats to all nominees and to the eventual winners of the Dragons, even if those awards are hopeless knuckle-dragging bad fan bad fun politically incorrect books that readers enjoy in spite of being told they ought not.

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