Okay, I lied, I’m a zombie.  Sorry.  Had appointment at six thirty am that ran MUCH MUCH later than it should and am home only briefly before running out again.

It looks like I won’t be doing much on the blog today, so, carry on!

204 responses to “I’M ALIVE, I SWEAR

  1. I swear, therefore I am.

  2. ok so which science experiment are we going to do today?

  3. 6:30 am appointments? The sun is not even up by then!

    • richardmcenroe

      It is. I’m just not sure why…

      • The sun gets up earlier in equatorial regions this time of year, to take advantage of the longer days there. Farther North it sleeps in, in part because the nights are so cold.

    • richardmcenroe

      It is. I’ve just never been sure why.

    • Around here right now the official rise time is shortly before that. I have been managing to be out for my doctor advised walk by then. This summer it has been too hot and the dew points to high to risk starting the walk much later than sun rise. With the passage of the second cold front, they are predicting that this changes, tomorrow’s low temperature is supposed to be some 20 degrees cooler – yeah!

    • This time of year, The Daystar is still up by then here in Arizona, since we don’t mess with Father Time. We constantly remain on Mountain Standard Time.

      As sure as I know anything, I know this. They’ll continue to do this again. Maybe on another continent, certainly on this windswept continent. Every year, this year, ten years from now, most of North America twice a year swings back to the belief that they can make Time… better. We in Arizona do not hold to that. So no more running from clock to clock. We aim to misbehave.


      • As a farmer, I’d prefer we just keep the same time year round. The critters wake and sleep with the sunrise and sunset anyway.
        And at this point, we have pretty much given up watching regular TV, nothing much is worth wasting that time.

    • You’re burnin’ daylight by 6:30. I hate the fact that so many places don’t open until the middle of the day*, nothing like wasting a day for an half hour appointment.

      *Says the guy who grocery shops at Winco because not only are they the best prices, but they are a 24 hour store, so I can grocery shop at 3 or 4 AM when there aren’t a bunch of idiots in the store.

      • but the idiots that are there are of a special breed. Fewer, but oh so much more special.

      • I used to have access to a Wally World near a military base with a 0530 shift change. By 0500 they had half a dozen live clerks, everything was restocked, but the hordes had not arrived yet. About as good as it got, except for the having to part with money bit.

        • Had the last really decent fight of my life in a Los Angeles Super Market at about 4 A..M. Bunch of A-holes tried do a smash and dash in the liquor aisle and when the stock crew got stuck in I just had to do my bit. Rolling around on the floor with one of them in a choke hold when his amigo starts beating me about the head and shoulders with one of those three-liter plastic vodka bottles, which splits and soaks me in cheap hooch. So I roll over and lunge from my knees and get his baggy ass pants by the waistband. Told the cops it was a DNA sample for them later.

      • The only 24 hour store near us is Walmart – and believe me, the people who shop there in the wee hours of the morning are kind of sort of idiots. Drunk and stoned idiots.

        I rarely go there unless it is the wee hours of the morning, so….

    • God bless you Dorothy, but the best bit is “Faqir, off!”

      The closest I could get is:

      Makes me proud to be British, it does. (wipes tear from eye)

  4. So — writing a sequel to your Black Tide Rising story?

    • I think it’s still Witch’s Daughter right now. I’m fairly certain I haven’t slept through the release announcement, so that’s got to be the still-current project.

  5. richardmcenroe

    Ah, she’s just ducking any more good advice on MHIG…

  6. It is always good to know that Sarah is alive! I’m sure that her storytelling might take a different turn when she’s writing as an undead.

  7. When the cat’s away— seriously I go zombie-like after a doctor’s appointment… and I have a lot of them. There must be something in the medical air–

    • Free-range Oyster

      Been mostly zombified for days now since minor-ish oral surgery. They never mentioned I’d be completely useless for at least 36 hours afterward. Well, that and I lost the scrip for the pain meds and couldn’t be bothered to find it. I mean, it’s just a little pain… why yes, that *is* a dunce cap on my head. Fancy that. Still, I’ve managed two project management meetings, edits on three business process maps, five loads of laundry folded, and none of the minions have starved or been eaten by goblins. Not great for three days, but I’ll take the victories I can get.

      • … none of the minions have starved or been eaten by goblins.

        Congratulations. Have you checked for changelings?

      • Dang … you did it without pain pills? I bow to you… Yes, pain is the great zombifier.

      • Now you know that recovery from surgery goes slower if you’re having a lot of pain. So I hope you’ve at least got something now.

        • Free-range Oyster

          Yeah, a few hundred mg of vitamin I seems to be sufficient if I’m careful (e.g. don’t let the Littlest Minion headbutt me in the jaw). Speaking of which, I should go take more now. And sleep eventually.

      • My dad had his wisdom teeth out before work one day; and refused pain meds because he was going to be operating heavy equipment.

        Yeah, he only made it a couple of hours, before giving up and going home, and I’m pretty sure he would have been safer operating the equipment on pain meds.

        • Ah, wisdom teeth. the schedule to take the drugs had me taking one at 3am

          For two nights, it enforced itself.

  8. so, carry on!
    Cary Grant

  9. What sort of an Evil Space Princess® lacks minions for these mundane tasks?

  10. The PUFF on a zombie that can actually type reasonably coherent sentences ought to be pretty high….

    • Plot bunny, free to a good home: zombie apocalypse, only it’s the original zombies from folklore. They aren’t dangerous. They just rise out of graves and morgues and get to work on whatever plan the sorcerer is up to.

      Nefarious plan, though. We are, after all, talking about a sorcerer who traps the dead and enslaves them.

      • As I recall, in the GURPS: Technomancer setting, reanimating the dead is part of the justice system in Louisiana. Some felons are sentenced to serve “life at hard labor, plus 10 years.” After they die in prison, they’re reanimated for 10 more years of hard labor. Once they finish that, the magic is reversed, and the bodies are finally laid to rest. One would hope that they are laid to rest in such a way as to prevent them being reanimated again by some rogue technomage; I don’t recall whether this was specified. An argument in favor of such a policy would be that the criminal had truly paid his debt to society, and therefore should be allowed a final rest.

        That’s not even truly nefarious (though it is truly disturbing). It just showed the Louisiana penal system in that setting as something in which you don’t want to find yourself enmeshed.

  11. When zombified, DO NOT eat SJW brains. You WILL starve.

  12. Has anyone checked out the new samovar on the sideboard yet? I don’t recall it being delivered and I usually notice that kind of thing …

    • If I stumble toward it, hands outstretched to grip a cup, saying “caffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeinnnnne….” Will I get mistaken for a zombie?

    • Ask the herbal brew accountant.

      He’s the one with the office labeled Teatotaller.

    • The aardvark reports that the brownies brought it in.

    • The Russian tea to go with it is in the cabinet beside the sideboard, bottom two shelves. Yes, the stuff with French and Cyrillic labels. Because it was less expensive that way. Yes, use the color chart on top of the second shelf, it has the English names. That’s not my department, but I am pretty certain that using mesquite chips for fuel would not end well. Those are for the meat smokers out back.

      • Mesquite flavored black tea? You might be on to something there.

        • Free-range Oyster

          I’ve heard of people smoking beverages or syrups; I suppose it could be done with tea. Or cold smoke the tea itself before brewing. Hmm… *adds notes to giant idea list*

          • some of the teas used in Russian Black tea is roasted in bamboo over a fire so it gets smoked when that happens. hmm, we need to get Louis Mueller to but some tea in the smokers …

          • Lapsang Souchong is a smoked black tea, one of the oldest, if not the oldest, of the black teas. (I believe that it is pine smoked.) Daddy, who was the one who introduced me to it, likes it very lightly steeped. I am more inclined to make it far too strong for most others.

        • Well. Mom Red likes piñon flavored coffee, and Russian Caravan has a smokey taste to it . . . Although, IMHO, pecan and apple wood should be reserved for BBQ. (There is one, and only one, benefit to an ice storm. Lots of new woods, for free, to try in the smoker.)

          • Russian Caravan is comforting to me, because it reminds me of the tea we would drink in school in Berlin.

            • Ah, Russian teas. May be smokey. May taste more strongly of roses than tea. May have bits of flower petal in large proportion to amount of tea leaves. May be flavoured with cardamom. May be dark black and bitter, and strong enough to grab you by the roots of your soul and drag you into full wakefulness despite being 6-1/2 months into a long winter, and not having seen the sun in weeks.

              Good stuff. (Except the rose petal tea; that’s hard for me to drink. My brain is all “No drinking perfume! Bad idea!”)

              • Russian caravan tea. I used to get that from our local tea shop until it closed.

              • “Except the rose petal tea; that’s hard for me to drink. My brain is all “No drinking perfume! Bad idea!”)”

                Rose petal tea is right up there with lavender wine and cilantro; any perfume flavored food or drink gets on my “I’d rather gargle 90W” list.

                • Having finally gotten back (Why did I wake up, dazed, in a labyrinth, anyway? No idea how I got there.) I can say that some things work and some do not. I have no issue with (or against) chamomile tea, but when someone decided that a ‘drop in’ bowl cleanser smelling of chamomile was a good idea… I found it a very bad one. A (less un)pleasant smelling toilet, fine. One that smells like something I sometimes drink? Bad idea.

              • Psssst. Kusmi tea. https://us-en.kusmitea.com/ Not cheap, but a little goes a long way.

                • Free-range Oyster

                  I’ve been working my way through a sampler of rooibos and other herbals from Dryad Tea and loving it. I fell in love with a couple, but had a few that smelled amazing and tasted bland; I’m pretty sure I did something wrong. I’m still a novice at proper tea preparation.

              • Free-range Oyster

                I take it you’ve no taste for those little Indian dough balls soaked in rose syrup, then? The Oyster Wife and I loved them, but I keep forgetting to harvest petals from our roses to make my own.

              • “Perfume” smelling tea probably wouldn’t bother me. However, a few years ago, we had a custom of several of us going to lunch once a month, ostensibly to celebrate the birthdays of everyone born in that month, and the birth month people would get to choose where we went. One month, we went to a Chinese place (I think), and someone ordered CORN tea. Apparently, it is made by putting corn kernels in water and boiling it until the kernels pop open. But it SMELLS like burnt popcorn. Ugh.

    • “Has anyone checked out the new samovar on the sideboard yet? I don’t recall it being delivered and I usually notice that kind of thing …”

      Oh, that was built out of the skulls of the last batch of SJW trolls to wander b… oh, wait, you said samovar? Nevermind.

  13. Did you know the Bible its own self sayith that only men should make coffee? It’s in the Old Testament book of HeBrews.

    • Do you know the verse? My Sunday school class would appreciate that very much: 6-12 grades (yes, we’re crazy). Then we’d have an excuse to always make the other teacher make the coffee–he does it best.

    • Oh, I got it. Sorry. On a concert high, not thinking clearly. HeBrews. Heh. B. is making coffee forever now.

  14. Sayeth, not sayith.

  15. Anyone want to bet that File770 summarizes this post as “Hoyt brags about her use of profanity. Admits she lies.”?