A note about the fundraiser: our mailbox service has told us we have…. 14 to 15 checks waiting. I will report on the full amount of the fundraiser in a couple of weeks.

Also, for those who have asked me if they can contribute later: I’m not leaving the fundraiser up. Sufficient onto the day the evil thereof and all that. Besides we start fulfilling the pledges next week. However, any funds received or (snail) mailed before the end of the month will get the reward. Also, if you’re one of my subscribers and have subscribed for a year at the tier amount, and WANT a reward, email me at the bookpimping address, and we’ll do our best to send it.

THE GOAL IS $50,000

the counter stands at: $40,293.86 USD* (Updated at least every 8 hours, more often if i happen to be here.)

IT ENDS today!

The reason I’m doing this:

I have worked for …. 15? 16 years at this blog, providing new content ALMOST every day (A bit less through the crazy move, though that was a lesson in what not to do, I guess) for…. very little. Even after you guys got me to put up a donation button, the most I ever got in a year was 4k, and lately it’s been around 2k, counting the commission from Amazon.

Now, I know times are tough (here too) but since the reason I started the blog didn’t work out, (the intersection between those who read my fiction and those who read my blog is sliver-thin) and since I’ve put my family through contortions, on weekends and vacations and all because “I have to put up a post.” I figured I owed it to them, more than to myself, to get something back for my effort.

Also, I’m trying to do too much in too little time.

I’m trying to get a fund that will allow me to hire (mostly friends) to do some of it for me, so I can both write more and make more money, which in turn will (maybe) allow me to get through what’s staring us in the face. (And it ain’t pretty.)


Tier 1– $10 or more – A shout out on my blog, all with all other the supporters, by name, in one massive “Thank you” post. [Jokey or offensive names will not be included at author’s discretion.]

Tier 2– $25 or more – Email jpg of certificate with funny fish saying “I Was Carped at according to hoyt.com” and a Certificate of being a member of Hoyt’s Huns, cultural wars sapper battalion, in good standing.

Tier 3– $60 or more – Exclusive ebook collection of USAian SHORT stories. (Including a new, original, never published story.) Estimated delivery August 2023

Tier 4– $100 or more – Your name will appear in a mass death/other mass event/list in one of Sarah’s books. [estimated delivery up through July 2023. All indie books, as no others are guaranteed.]

Tier 5– $150 or more – A sound file of Sarah saying “Moose and Squirrel.”

Tier 6 – $250 or more – Will send a signed copy of trade paperback Gentleman takes a chance and one large postcard with book covers, also signed. (USPS- continental US only. All others, let’s talk.) [estimated delivery Sept 2022]

Tier 7 – $350 or more – Three signed books (of our choice), plus two extra items from “Sarah’s Garage”, (also of our choice) which might very well be a small rubber fish. (You’ve been warned.) USPS only. Continental U.S. only [estimated delivery Sept 2022]

Tier 8 – $500 or more – Personalized tuckerization. You will become your very own zany character, with at least a line or two of dialogue, and physical description. Physical safety and life of character not guaranteed. If you perish, it will NOT (repeat not) be in a mass death event or a list of other kinds.  [estimated delivery up through July 2023. All indie books, as no others are guaranteed.] [Jokey or offensive names, descriptions and personalities will not be included at author’s discretion.]

Tier 9 – $1000 or more – A CHOICE OF:

Option 1 -Will read the first 10 pages and outline of your novel and provide timely critique, with the understanding that I am not infallible. (A skype, zoom or other video call to discuss the work for an hour or so.) [estimated delivery Winter 2022 – Spring 2023]

Option 2 – Large box of ten signed books, plus items ranging from a con badge, to a mini dinosaur skeleton or a print of Sarah’s original art, or other items from Sarah’s garage. USPS only. Continental U.S. only [estimated delivery Sept 2022]

Option 3 – Signed copy of Sarah’s old copyedited or page-proof manuscripts. [estimated delivery Fall 2022] (5 limit.)

Tier 10 $5000 or more – You will become a major character on one of my books, and I’ll try to reflect your appearance, and chosen personality.  [estimated delivery up through July 2023. All indie books, as no others are guaranteed.] [Jokey or offensive names, descriptions and personalities will not be included at author’s discretion. You don’t get to have someone else be an offensive character. (Sorry!) Your actions will be altered to serve the plot if needed.] – Limit 5. (You’ll be informed if this has been claimed, and given a chance for a refund or of a comparable reward.)

Tier Insane – $25000 or more – My husband and I will travel to a city in the continental US and have dinner with you and your plus one.  (Continental US only.) – Limit ONE. [Delivery up to July 2023.] (You’ll be informed if this has been claimed, and given a chance for a refund or of a comparable reward.)


If you want to be thanked/mentioned by a name different from your regular one, please email to: bookpimping at outlook dot com.


DONATE TO ACCORDING TO HOYT TAANSTAFL DAYS (The previous words are a link!)


Sarah A. Hoyt

Goldport Press

304 S Jones Blvd #6771

Las Vegas, NV  89107


This being the last day, dancing seemed appropriate!

This Picture was created by Sarah A. Hoyt and is released under CC BY


And my very favorite bat meme!


  1. Next year, I suggest controlled experimentation to see which critters bring in the most. I vote for oxen, otters, and American Shorthairs in honor of the non-human Huns (I’m sorry, dragons are just not that cuddly).

        1. Only after roasting, which generally happens only when the human annoys the dragon. [Big Dragon Grin]

          1. Some day, I’d love to see a large dragon descend upon a Hollywood celebrity roast. For an encore, said dragon could do the annual press dinner in Washington.

      1. When they’re not being annoying, they make excellent pets. Some breeds (of dragon) can even take human form to walk their little darlings, and take them on shopping trips. It’s so much fun to dress them up! And they’re even largely self-sufficient, so long as you make sure they don’t neglect themselves (habitat enrichment is a large part of this, so make sure they’ve got enough adventures to go on).

        1. We live with a very young dragon named Avrim. (Avrim T. Dragon III to be precise). He’s an exchange student from Dragonland and attends the local elementary school. On Sunday, he helps us give the children’s message, which happens whether we have children or not.
          We have fun. A background in informal commercial del’ arte comes in useful.

      1. I have a friend who self-identifies as an otter. I don’t think he even realized I was doing a fundraiser (He is going through his own narrow passage) but if he had, he’d have been disappointed no otters.

    1. Really, I suspect dragons – cuddly or not – would do better at drawing in funds than oxen. Mind, NOT saying such should be avoided, but, well, down-to-earth perspective. I suspect the wallabies might even give the bats a run for the money.

      1. Unfortunately if historical views and Tolkien can be trusted Dragons have a tendency to horde. So although the dragon may gather more overall getting the funds back might be an issue.

        1. On the other hand, Sarah is a Dragon, A Female Dragon.

          No Male Dragon would dare cheat a Female Dragon especially one who is a Mother.

          The only being more dangerous than a Female Mother Dragon is a Female Mother Dragon who is a Navy Chief. (Tip of the hat to Robin Brooks of Baen’s Bar).

  2. Dancing under a Blue Sun or just under Blue Spotlights? 😉

      1. Honestly, the floor is glowy, and it’s supposed to be a palace. I didn’t have time to dampen the light, because we were going out, and the laptop doesn’t have the werewithal to render.

        1. Sarah, I can’t figure out where her second arm is. And the shoulder for the arm held up looks… boneless at the joint.

          1. her second harm is back and under his, but HIS looks boneless.Um… I might have to recast that side. This is what I get for going with pre-cast poses. I’ll post the corrected one tomorrow, when I’m home. Might also tone down the light.
            I checked hers. she’s just really skinny.

      2. Fusion power used for direct lighting of dance floors will be all the rage in a century or so 🙂 . As for where our heroines right arm is I see some of it now that our that our hostess has pointed it out. Given the Hero’s quizzical look I originally thought she might be reaching behind them and giving her dance partner a little pinch on the posterior.

  3. Dracula has never looked so cute before.

    Come to think of it, if someone’s running a D&D campaign with a devious vampire mastermind, that’s a brilliant way to use their Charm ability against a player. Have them slip in like an adorable bat, possibly with a wing broken from getting ‘caught in a storm.’

    DM: Roll a Wisdom save against cuteness.
    Player: This bat is suspicious. And bats can’t be cute, what are you talking about? They’re flying rats.
    DM: (pulls out a phone and shows the Player these pictures)
    Player: I fail the save.
    DM: You haven’t even rolled.
    Player: I said. I. Fail.
    DM: Right, then. (cackles inwardly, rubbing his/her hands together gleefully.)

    1. >

      Player: I said. I. Fail.



      Never been that much of a role-player, but then again no one’s ever tried that on me with kittens…

      1. On the flip side, how would the average player react if told to make a save vs. cuteness?

    1. Cute, but she seems to be gazing earnestly into empty space. Not sure that’s what I’m looking for in a dance partner.

        1. Reminds me a bit of the videos of the Ararashii Gakko group. Not a big fan of their music or their videos though. Too teeny bopper and too nihilistic. If those lyrics accurately reflect the thoughts and feelings of teens in Japan, it’s small wonder they have such a high suicide rate.

  4. Many thanks for this!

    Asking for help is a key skill. (It happens to be one I have trouble with.)

    I’m mostly a lurker, but I enjoy nearly everything I’ve read of yours, and very much want you to continue.

    You should have gotten $100 (under my name or DJS Ltd.). Keep up the good work! (Oh, and if I become part of a mass death, do have fun writing it!)

    1. Forty one. I tried to update this morning, but net through my phone is weird. I’ll do Sunday post when I’m back home.
      And I MIGHT — on the outlier side — have funded fully for all I know. We’re up to 15 checks in the mailbox this morning. And I KNOW — because people told me — there were more mailed yesterday.
      As I said, I’ll update in a couple of weeks. I suspect it will add to around 45k but who knows?
      I honestly didn’t expect it, so soon after you guys saved my butt.
      BUT if I hadn’t done a fundraiser this year, I’d have lost my nerve and never done one.
      So…. Next year.

      1. And now that you’re done fundraising, I want to bring up a couple of things concerning my upcoming LP:

        1) While I wanted to do it for fun years ago (before giving up on emails with you), lately I’ve been thinking of trying my hand at doing LPs more professionally. Because, frankly, you’re not the only one who could use a little extra money around here. I’ll still be happy to do it either way, but if you don’t mind I’d like to put a donation link in the post and see if it goes anywhere.

        2) I’m also thinking that if I AM going to try and make money under a pseudonym, I should change my ‘nym to something a bit more marketable than a short, unpronounceable string of consonants. And as it happens I’ve had an alternative in mind for a while.

        So I’ll need you to approve my next comment (which will be in response to this one):

            1. Thank you, thank you! You’re a wonderful audience!

              …Although, I realize I’ve made a slight mistake here. Since this new name is associated with the email that I use for subscriptions, I’m no longer getting emailed my own comments. I kind of like having those on file since it makes it easier to search for old conversations I’ve been a part of.

              Plus, sticking to the same avatar might reduce any confusion as to who I am.

              So, Sarah, I apologize for imposing again so soon, but if you would please approve this name for the other email I use here (comment incoming):

              1. [WizardGuy casts off his disguise to reveal… that he wasn’t actually wearing a second disguise and is now suddenly underdressed. Embarrassed, he slinks off stage to go rewrite his act.] 😛

                1. Sarah sends a bear after him, because THAT should warrant exeunt pursued by a bear.
                  Grabs shepherd’s hook, pulls DGM: THAT’s not stage left, dude.
                  Points: THAT way. You went out towards sunk Hun gaming table, and almost stepped on Foxfier’s head…. The last guy who did that– Well. He was buried in a matchbox. That’s all that was left. The Fox is very cute, but her eldritch form….. shudders. There are legends, okay?

                    1. Uh Uh. Honey, here at According to Hoyt, we use AXES to cut slack. I used the shepherd’s hook, because I LIKE YOU.
                      Pats the wizard on the head, and sends him on his way.

                  1. Operative word being “tried,” I presume. Would failure be considered a bad ending or a good one? 😛

                    1. Not sure, but some of us have been known to cause the camera to break when a picture of us is attempted.

          1. > “David G. Miles?”


            No, and I have no idea where you got that from. Is that a reference to something?

            As for my actual new ‘nym – I’m still waiting for Sarah to approve it – it was something born of a moment of frustration signing up for an online game. Then I realized it kind of suited me for other reasons.

            1. Oh, wait, you were assuming DGM were my initials. Never mind, I see where you got it now.

  5. Probably because I’ve been starting edits on something, but I see the “I am the darkness” meme and I see Arthur and Deborah. Dark, brooding, perpetually solitary Hunter hears a pastel-clad five year old squeal, “Bunicot!” as she hurls herself at him.

  6. You wNt to talk about stress? Look at the banking/housing situation in China. People are protesting, knowing it means the gulag… because their money is just gone…

    Or how about the people in Sri Lanka? No money, no food, no help on the horizon.

    We are so blessed in the USA; but it could easily happen here, too.

    Romans 1:18-32.

    Yeah, I know some (many) of you don’t go for that; but the similarities are more than just simple chance.

    Give it a read, give it a thought, and get on with what you think is important.

    1. I have looked at those. And yes, I expect us to be somewhat …hungry this fall.
      I’m not comparing. I STILL get stressed asking to be paid. It’s not the same stress, but it is stress.
      You just did the equivalent of “Don’t say your head hurts. You could be a double amputee.” True, but nonsense.

      1. One of my bosses in government used to say, “Be glad you have a job,” whenever higher was messing us over. It did not improve morale.
        I wasn’t surprised to hear recently the entire organization crashed and burned several years ago. Yes, even Department of the Army divisions can crash and burn. You just don’t hear about it.

      2. Greatest fear? That the Biden Administration is going to go farther than FDR and try for a Hail Mary for total communist totalitarian takeover under the guise of “saving us”.

          1. Biden has totally screwed up almost everything he tries. And he is trying real hard.

            He may wind up being the guy that saves the Republic. He may set back the Tranzis by a century.


            1. I sometimes hypothesize that the reason why Hitler can never be killed by a time traveler is that the Time Cops know what a disaster lies ahead if eugenics is not discredited.

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