Weird Spam

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Yes, I was going to do a post. And note today I kept my outdoor activities to 2 1/2 hours, so I shouldn’t be this ditsy.

Except that by the time I came inside, now almost three hours ago, I looked like I’d stepped into a shower fully clothed, and I’ve been sitting here not doing much except staring at the screen.  So I’m going to guess I’m still a little out of it.

Today’s program involved honorable combat with the neighbor’s Virginia creeper which had eaten the flower beds on the west side of our yard, and was making a fair go at our pine tree on that side.  Not completely beaten back yet, but I’ve discovered more innocent plants smothered in it, though one is quite dead and I have no idea what it even was.  Perhaps lavender, by the looks of the remains?

I’ll return to full writing tomorrow, promise, but I’m trying to take advantage of having younger son here while he’s here.  He’s capable of a lot of work without complaining.  Since Dan can’t help, due to his knee issues, and older son is very busy, this is a boon and not to be wasted.  Also, if he can’t find an engineering job after he finishes his degree, I shall rent him out as Earth-moving machinery.  Seriously.  Nothing makes it clearer the difference in musculature between male and female than the things he can do and I can’t.  Yes, age probably has something to do with that as well.

Mostly, though, I’m grateful for the generous spirit that allows a twenty-four year old to be kicked out of bed at six am and set to work with no complaint, on things he can’t have the slightest interest in.  At his age, I’d have done it but bitched all the while.

So, until I return and to amuse you: yesterday I did what I do about once a month and went through spam and trash folders to rescue those of your comments that WordPress decided were inexplicably dangerous.

I found a few, and also a lot of real trash and spam.

Now, most of those are unimaginative, and just the sales of medicines, or whatever.  A notable one last week was a commenter bragging of the excellent health care… in China. No, seriously.  It was on point, and a response to the post, but so deluded I couldn’t help but leave it in trash, under same principle as “Not today, ISIS.”

Anyway, there was a funny (because so insane) one in this month’s crop which I’ll reproduce below.  First, Nigerian… illuminati? Second illuminati as a way to make money? And third… Mr. Steve…. WHAT?
At any rate, I figured you guys would be amused.

MY NAME IS SUNDAY EVANS I AM FROM NIGERIAN AM HERE TO SHARE MY TESTIMONY ON HOW I JOIN THE ILLUMINATI YOU MUST BE CAREFUL HERE, MOST OF THE COMMENT ABOUT JOINING ILLUMINATI ARE FAKE I WAS RECENTLY SCAM BY 8 PEOPLE CLAIMING TO BE ILLUMINATI AGENT. I LOST OVER $7,000 UNTIL I COME ACROSS A TESTIMONY ONLINE OF A MAN NAME RICH DOLLAR THANKING THIS GREAT MAN CALLED MR. STEVEN WHO MAKES ME WHAT I AM TODAY PLEASE IF YOU WANT TO BE A MEMBER OF ILLUMINATI QUICKLY CALL OR WHATSAPP. MR STEVEN Hello my brothers and sisters this message is coming right from the good Temple of Illuminati, Alot of people have been scam and dupe just because they want to join the brotherhood of Illuminati, so my brothers and sisters for those of you who are serious and ready to join here is your opportunity now to join the illuminati and achieve your dreams. 9 month ago I try to join the brotherhood of Illuminati but I was Scam by the fake people using the website on till I meet the right member called : MR. STEVEN who help me to be a member of the brotherhood today am so happy because money is no longer my problem now, …… If you need a help to join the Illuminati call OR whatsapp ………….(email and phone number deleted)…… May you live long you are a real son of the Illuminati

125 responses to “Weird Spam

  1. Paul (Drak Bibliophile) Howard

    LOL 😆

  2. We can’t speak or type, but we shall rule the planet as a secret cabal. Buy in now, and for free, we will include a large neon sign proclaiming “We are the rulers of the universe” (just pay shipping and handling). Act Now!

  3. BobtheRegisterredFool

    PRC healthcare is totes better because of chicken blood injections. Chinese web novels make it sound like meth, so it has to be much better than anything we have in the US.

    Re: 2nd son. Sent something to sahoyt@… 6/26, re-sent via forwarding 8/5, commented here both days, pinged here again in the comments for the sunday vignettes 8/11. Please search inbox for ‘bob’ and ‘fool’, or ask me to dig up an old gmail account from somewhere, or ask me to quit.

  4. Well, I know Jim Jones isn’t alive anymore; so maybe this scammer is his reincarnation? Funny, but I thought he’d come back as a cockroach, or slime mold.

    My planet is still infested with Illuminati? Damn. Those things are worse than a house full of cats with fleas.

    Best place for an engineer with a degree to go if he or she can’t get a job using that degree is a laborer job in that field. Heavy equipment operator, stupid end of the surveying stick, shovel, carpenter apprentice, machine shop apprentice, lab equipment cleaner, beginning welder, even automotive repair apprentice. Knowing the bottom end will make you an even more effective engineer on the top end; and you’ll be in better position to see openings to apply for.

    • Aye. All too many time I’ve worked on something and grumped that whoever committed it never had to deal with assembling or repairing the thamn ding.

    • or take a couple classes in cnc programming…

    • Best place for an engineer with a degree to go if he or she can’t get a job using that degree is a laborer job in that field.

      That’s the advice Howard Roark gives.

      • It’s been more than 40 years since I read The Fountainhead. All I can say is life experience has cemented what I internalized decades ago.

    • To be fair, he hasn’t looked, because he hasn’t graduated, and there isn’t much part time in the Springs, where he has to live for a year. This is mostly under “Sarah worries obsessively over her sons, every step of the way.”

      • The time to start looking is BEFORE he graduates. Don Asher explains in some of his excellent lectures (available on youtube) on job hunting that “I’m a student…” are magic words that make it much easier to visit a company in a field you might want to work. You don’t go to get the job at that time. You go to “meet and greet” people already working in the field. Get contact info (business cards), make note of what they like or work on, and make an excuse to follow up with them: “Hey, I noticed all the old warbird pictures in your office and thought you’d like to know about this little airshow that’ll be over at…” or “I remember you told me you were into fishing, and my mother has this cannon…” Whatever. The point is that LATER when he is looking for a job he has a list of people he can email or call to say “Hey, Mr. Warbird… I just graduated and was looking for a job. I was wondering if you knew anyone in the industry that had openings right now.” And the answer will be “Sure, company X just got a big contract let me give you the phone number of a buddy of mine over there.” or “Well, we could sure use some help here in QA, why don’t you come by for lunch later this week and I’ll introduce you to the dept. head.” and not… “Who are you again?”

        I’ll note the reason the student has to visit the company doesn’t have to be “I might want to work here”. You could be arranging a tour for the student section of the professional society, or looking for speakers to come, or writing a paper on some process they use, etc. The point is to make the contacts while you’re still a student and companies will open the doors to him much more easily than for just someone unemployed and looking for work. BTW, professional society meetings are good too. Not the student chapters, the grown-up ones.

    • Like many things in my life I had to do it all in reverse order. Spent fifteen years after highschool at factory work before getting a degree in combined industrial and systems engineering.
      Spent the next 25 years mainly as a ground support engineer for experiment operations in low earth orbit. NASA civil service.
      Must say that I used as much if not more of what I learned from that factory work as what I was taught in college.
      Got tired of having successful scientifically valid programs cancelled out from under me so when I qualified for it I retired.
      Now I do a bit of research, provide subject matter advice, and the occasional edit job when certain procrastinating authors finally ever finish a draft manuscript.
      OH, and tweak those slovenly lazy bums because they are so very dear to me. Badgering them gives my retirement purpose.

      • Uncle Lar
        You are to be congratulated for the wise choice. Many of your colleagues are still at NASA and other National labs. My wife, who has a Ph.D in Astrophysics and has worked with scientists there, once gave a talk there and said that the audience looked like a retirement center. One of the bosses that she worked with is now in his eighties, who just spends his time going with his wife to conferences.
        She also spent almost a year working working at an astrophysics institute in France. Since there government employees are required to retire at 65, the scientists there were much younger and more active. Here most of her colleagues that graduated with her have left the field. Unfortunately much of our scientific community clings to their jobs, steering funding to their buddies, rewriting papers and going to conferences. So nothing much original gets done with the large the amount of funding given. NASA is living on its past glories.

        Forgive the rant. It is something that I have wanted to say for a long time. Also, I have enjoyed the blog for a long time because SAH reminds me of my wife, who came from a Communist country in the Balkans. I am not a writer of fiction unless you call what economist write fiction, but I left the field awhile ago. And we also have a son who is finishing his degree in chemical engineering this year.

    • an Odd that has worked for us a few times has returned full time after getting her degree(s), to work as an Operator II. The Lead and I think the Supe (we got a new supe, tis our old Lead) are trying to get her to go for Blender (an Op III position), but I have no clue why she returned to us, really. iirc she took Mechanical Engineering for her degree (At Michigan Tech) and while bored took a years worth of Electrical Engineering in a semester for something to do. Well, not much to do up in Houghton, MI. I guess. If she does go elsewhere, she has plenty of “What Not To Do” designs to draw from in her work area . . . especially if she becomes a Blender. We have two blend stations but both feed a single line so one can’t be used while the other is.
      The whole set-up there makes my teeth itch. Glad to be moving across town soon. The plan is to put in a functional blend station where I am currently.

    • “Funny, but I thought he’d come back as a cockroach, or slime mold.”

      He did. But he sinned grievously in each, so has been reincarnated once more as something even lower.

      • He’s a bureaucrat with the [state/federal/provincial/county] department/agency of [your favorite here]? That would explain a great deal…

  5. Now I gotta go dig that one weird email I had saved from years ago asking for help from fellow space travelers or time travelers. I don’t know if the person that sent it was off their meds, was sending a secret message, or was trying to drive someone else nuts.

    And drink more water is my first and only guess. Now you can tell me why I’ve been sleepy all day. I thought I’ve slept the last three nights.

  6. Oh, I still get lots of spams to my websites – the most pernicious of them are in Russian, now.
    For some reason, they were fond of attaching to certain pictures in old posts.
    I finally had to close comments on anything more than 15 days old.
    Found a WordPress spam-killer called “CleanTalk” which apparently recognizes new spam as such, and kills it promptly. But occasionally, one does leak through, until I hunt it down and kill it personally.

  7. That offer of membership in the Illuminati is *almost* as attractive as the ads to join the Rosicrucians in the back of my comic book when I was a kid . . .

    • I heard that they closed the museum at their HQ in San Jose. It had a decent, though quirky Egyptian museum, and a nice planetarium. No idea why they’d combine the two, but then I ignored (most of) the ads in the back of the comic books, and always at the back of the Sunday newspaper magazines.

    • Carrington Dixon

      They advertised in comic books?! From my youth I remember them from ads in the back of the second-string stf magazines.

      • Sunday magazines only in my recollection (didn’t discover the pulp SF mags til much later and seldom read Mechanix Illustrated). The comics had various toys (catapult rocket with parachute for mercury type capsule) and ads for martial arts unknown in the present day.

        I got a booklet on “Yubiwaza”, which did me no good in junior high dustups, though it had a section on breaking boards if you had a 1 x 4 board cut crossgrained. Hell, Specks the cat could have broken that board…

      • Catholic Digest used to advertise them a long, long time ago.
        Uh oh. Now I have American Pie playing in my head.

    • “you can find your love with diagrams, in a plain brown envelope” Leonard Cohen.

  8. Virginia Creeper: it’s not kudzu, but it has ambitions!

    • Why would anyone even want that stuff? The idea that there are people out there who’d want to plant it and actually pay money to get it is beyond me.

      • They couldn’t get a proper Pottsylvania Creeper?

      • If you have an unsightly area in your yard, that you can’t remove/replace, it’s a good cover. In this case, I think the neighbor is trying to thicken and heighten (totally a word) the fence between our yards, so his dogs leave our yard alone.

        • The choice for that application out here in prior decades was ivy, which turns that area into rat-central-station. Plus the redwood fence always eventually rots/succumbs to the ubiquitous termites (oh, creosote, how we miss you), though if the ivy runs thick enough it will hold the fence skeleton upright, until it doesn’t during one of the major winter storms we get.

          All of which to say the clearing process is definitely worthwhile, and free labor while younger son is around makes perfect sense.

        • Yes? Mr. Webster agrees with us. Triggered a memory of an argument when I was an obstreperous young sprout and had the quaint belief that English rules should be rational.

          “High,” “higher,” “highest.” “Heighten – to make higher.”
          “Tall,” “taller,” “tallest.” “Tallen – to make taller.”

          (That might have been “taighten” or some such – my truly sharp memories of those days are where the matter was referred to the Board of Education, which this dispute apparently avoided.)

      • My understanding is that some of the thistles were brought to the US as a decorative plant. Shudder. Granted, the flowers have a nice color, but the rest of the plant is evil.

    • Wild grape and wild cucumber will give both a run for their money.

    • This one is making like kudzu. Which in Colorado is DAMN impressive.

    • Creeper beats poison ivy.

  9. Christopher M. Chupik

    I guess that beats the usual “cheap, generic Viagra” type I used to get in my mailbox.

  10. I got to bed at a decent time last night, the baby only woke me up for snacks once, and… I lay awake staring at the ceiling from about four to six.

    So I have a reason to be spacy!

  11. Now why would anyone want to join the Illuminati? At this point, unless you are related to one of the families, which would already make you a member, you can only join at the lowest of levels. People at those levels are basically used as foot soldiers and servants, so you get to either be a slave, cannon fodder, or if you are truly unlucky, used as a human sacrifice or become the main dish at one of the cannibalistic feasts. Who would want any of that? SO much better to join the Brightening Path. Sure, it’s smaller and less world-dominaterey, but at least you are MUCH less likely to become a soup ingredient, and they have free tooth whitening Saturdays! Just send a self addressed stamped envelope to

    • Why would anyone want to join the Illuminati? When my high school gave us aptitude tests my #1 result was “Cannon Fodder” with a specific high score as a cultist. If you’re gonna be cultist cannon fodder, why not aim for the top?

    • My eternal problem with Batman villains– where do they get their mooks?

      “Hey, I’ll dress up in a snow-parka and aim the freeze ray. A fellow like Mr. Freeze is sure to be very good employer material.”

      • Organized crime pays fairly well, until you get caught, or rubbed out by the competition. And their retirement and healthcare plans suck.

        • Which, come to think of it, is probably why supervillains go into politics.

        • You don’t get much more organized than the Fed… definitely a criminal class.

        • And your typical crook thinks a) “I’m too smart to get caught, and I’m better than those mooks who got caught”. and b) “let some schmuck stay stuck in an office working for peanuts. Not me, baby!”

      • Paul (Drak Bibliophile) Howard

        Marvel had a villain called “Taskmaster” (IIRC).

        He didn’t go out committed crimes.

        He trained “henchmen” for various other super villains. 😀

        Oh, I’ll admit that I wonder how Joker gets anybody insane enough to work for him. 😆

        • naah, he committed crimes too, he was one of Cap’s roster of enemies.

          • Paul (Drak Bibliophile) Howard

            At first, he was primarily a “trainer of goons” but yes he did become an active super-villain.

            A little later, he became more of a mercenary who took more legitimate jobs.

        • Christopher M. Chupik

          Considering how real-life psychos can inspire devoted followings, I have no trouble seeing how the Joker could do the same.

        • I wonder how Joker gets anybody insane enough to work for him.

          He sends out spam emails and takes those who click through.

        • You think people will turn down the Joker if he offers to hire them?

          • Paul (Drak Bibliophile) Howard

            Not to his face but they may not show up.

            Of course, in the animated Batman shows, they show that Joker had money problems so Joker couldn’t afford to pay minions. 😉

        • I read a fanfic series that featured one of the Joker’s henchmen. He went by the Joker name of Giggles because his real name was Greg Brady.

      • It’s the benefits package. Imagine what a supervillain’s 401k matching contribution would look like. And the vacation days. Better than the .gov jobs, even. Really can’t be beat.

        Err… or so I hear.

  12. In college I got a pair of weird, disjointed spam emails that were made up of nothing but random phrases cobbled together into a wall of text. I ended up breaking them up and splicing them with each other to make a weird, abstract sort of poem thing. It’s been transferred to every laptop I’ve owned since then. I know that it’s somewhere on the current one and it makes me feel weird because I don’t actually know how to poetry.

  13. I’ve taken to cleaning the spam filter daily, if only because it sometimes catches things I actually do want r, more likely, things I want to forward t Amazon and various bank anti-spoofing addresses. I doubt they actually act against the phishers but want to give them the opportunity.

    For some reason an awful lot of spam these past few weeks has involved invitations to interact in highly unhygienic ways with all manner of females of various age and relationship status promising to well, quite honestly, bore me silly. I admit to deriving some degree of amusement from meta-analysis of the approaches — lusty seems to be hot right now — and appeals — apparently hefty haunches are in demand from the people who actually do respond to these invitations?

    It all gets a trifle tedious and dispiriting, wondering whether anybody is actually foolish enough to respond to these missives, but they are (marginally) more entertaining than the “investment” opportunities daily delivered.

    • Since 1&1 became Ionos, their spamfilter has become positively hyperactive… even on low setting, pretty much anything not whitelisted gets trapped.

    • They must have some bizarre notion that you have money to burn on “fancies”.

    • Oh, this is the spam on the blog. I check the email spam more frequently.

    • I get phishing emails all, the, time,
      at my work account.
      They are from work.
      If you fall for them, or fail to report them, they berate you.
      I do wish they’d let me reply to these with “your testing me for financial scams would likely work better if I was maybe someone who actually had something remotely to do with expenses.
      They did almost get me with one using a subject “Your new PC is ready”. I was going to answer it by asking where IT set it up, as my desk doesn’t exist yet, and the office I am to use is not yet fully empty, but when I opened it it had “We just need the number of your corporate card to pay for it.”
      oh for frog snacks
      4 emails up was a “IT Work Order Completion” email telling me my new work pc was delivered to the new warehouse for install by IT.
      My email at work cannot receive email that doesn’t originate outside the company. If it does, it goes to a sterile folder, they send me notification (and leave off who the @%$k it is from so I could guess if it is relevant) and I gotta jump hoops to even read the non-html text.
      But, every 3rd week or so I get a false phish from corporate IT.

      • your department should bill IT for your lost productivity in playign stupid games with them.

        • if only we could.
          The local IT guy said there was little to no phising at the plant locations and we never had a problem until corporate came up with this brainstorm everyone hates

        • One place I worked got the bright idea that we should itemize everything we did during the day.

          In 5-minute blocks.

          I got called in and admonished for turning in a report containing many entries for “filling out meaningless time sheets.” They wanted me to stop doing that. I asked if they were ordering me to falsify my time sheets, and if so, were they willing to put it in writing?

          No, I really wasn’t a good fit in the corporate world…

          • I’m sorry, did you say FIVE minute blocks? Fifteen minute blocks are hard enough.

            • And then there was the engineer who had reservations for winter camping in a national park. I really think it was Yellowstone, but it was decades ago (yikes!), and the bosses wanted him to reschedule because of a project he was working on. I can’t remember what happened. Good ole 12&3 changed its name to “advancing” (let’s say) and then got bought out by their competition.

              • Paul (Drak Bibliophile) Howard

                One guy I knew was working 60-80 hour weeks consulting at this “not to be named” company.

                He finally got “finished” enough to take a vacation.

                While he was on vacation, the idiots at “not to be named” got his emergency contact phone number from the consulting firm.

                The idiots called him about something that really could have waited until he was back from vacation.

                He spent a day or so “holding the idiots hands” and took a couple of more vacation days.

                What “not to be named” didn’t know was that he had gotten an offer while on vacation.

                So he accepted the offer and gave notice when he returned from vacation. 😈 😈 😈 😈

                • Got back from vacation more than once to complaints “We couldn’t reach you.” Uhhhhh. What part of “sure you can call … 800-Dial-A-Prayer or 800-Dial-A-Tree, I’m out of contact, didn’t you get? We are going to …” Pick one: Yellowstone or Pick-A-NP-without-cell-service, backpacking, Boy Scout Camp …

                  Oops. Forgot the ONE time someone got through. Listened to the question. Answer. “Don’t have computer with me. Sorry it’ll have to wait till I get back.” Followed by “Don’t have a computer, because I don’t have power”, let alone the weight, with an implied “you idiot” tacked on.

                • Nowadays they address that by adding a “non-compete” clause to your employment contract that can be interpreted as not allowing you to take that other offer until 6-12 months have passed. They’ve lost court cases on them…. but that doesn’t mean they won’t put YOU thru the process of punishment to see if they lose again.

                  • I ran into that in 2002. My response was “Really? I was let go. You are in Bankruptcy! Good luck with that.” I was interpreting it as doing “*exactly what I was doing for the former company”. They could not restrict me from preforming my trade (programming/design in general). Nor could they restrict me from using the same generic tools, nor the same programming techniques or logical code processes. Not that any in the list, other than programming/design reuse was an issue; but still.

                    * Although much later wished I had some of the C code I worked on. Could have just gone and found it on the internet (that is where it was pulled from in the first place) but, time restraints, plus the C code from the project had everything fixed 🙂 Would have also been translating into C# …

            • “…and the number of thy counting shall be five.”

              Yes.

              I guess we were supposed to be grateful it wasn’t “three.”

              Mostly, the result of a chain of managers who feared what people might get up to if they weren’t under direct eyeball supervision. Which is a primary indicator of “has no idea what they’re doing and fear for their jobs”, but that sort of thing can’t be fixed from the bottom up. At least, not without hand grenades…

              Bonus: every three or four months, most of them would leave for a week for a company “retreat” where they were supposed to learn management and leadership. After a while we learned we might as well quit working and screw off until they got back, because our projects would all be reassigned, “re-evaluated”, or canceled anyway…

          • Worked for a similar type company. I had 4 code categories: Design/Programming, meetings, supporting support, and direct customer support (which I was suppose to be the last resort). To get any programming actually done, typically worked more than 8 hours. BUT, you couldn’t enter more than 8 hours into the time system. So, I based it off of percentages, with any non-programming (internal support) automatically getting any rounding, plus whatever extra time their every interruption disrupted the programming. 🙂

            As much a PIA the timesheets were to fill out, one benefit, when someone finally looked at them, was support had to filter their questions through their manager; interruptions dropped dramatically, as did any pass through of the client directly to me. No. Support was NOT a programming activity! Neither were “where are you in …” meetings.

            To be honest, the entire R&D Engineering department, weren’t very good corporate drones … I wasn’t the only one doing the above out of my department. Support manager had a very not nice department review from HR one quarter … Whining (also known as B$%^&*&^%) about it sure hadn’t helped. Nice of them to provide a tool that did.

          • Jeesh.

            Never had to do less than 6 minutes, myself.

            (One tenth an hour, so one decimal place. . . .)

      • I actually clicked on the link for one of those “Test phishing” emails that our IT Security dept put out once… Just to be funny. I, of course reported myself with a big grin on my face. (note… I work for a smaller company, so I knew in advance IT Security would get the joke.)

      • Unfortunately, the cost of a successful phishing and database encryption attack would destroy hundreds of people’s jobs, not to mention threaten the health, safety, and lives of the patients, in the hospital I work at. So as much as we detest the in-house play attacks; they really are a necessary evil.

  14. I seem to get blog spam about dating services, lawn-care tools, and stuff in Turkish and Portuguese. Oh, yeah, and huge long posts about gambling in Macau. Since I have no spare money and have even less desire to go to anywhere owned by China, their efforts are, alas, wasted.

  15. If I were inclined to think it a public service to separate fools from their money, I would probably make my target audience a slightly more educated and presumably wealthier class of fool.

    • I’m not familiar with the Minotaur language, but if the grammar is anything like email spam I might have to learn just for the entertainment value.

  16. Well darn. And here I thought I had to brave the deepest jungle, and find the dread pyramid of Ichlichlichlichlitlz to get Illuninati-ated.

    And all I needed was Steve. Ah well.

  17. And here all it took for me to get lit up was a few cans of Schlitz . . .

  18. Now, suppose the real problem is that Mr. Steven is actually some poor slob that the scammer got po’ed at, and decided to send him some interesting email. So… just imagine Mr Steven trying to answer these people who assume he knows the secrets of the Illuminati and how to get rich, and refuse to believe they have been rooked.

  19. I always liked getting rich in Illuminati; the Gnomes of Zurich was one of my favorites, and when I was at my best it was fairly easy to look like I was spending more money than I was.

    We are talking about the card game, right? Because whoever wrote that email sure looks to have been hit with the Orbital Mind Control Lasers and turned Weird.

    • I always preferred the UFOs myself. And my favorite target to control was the Semi-conscious Liberation Army.

      It’s been too long since I’ve played that.

    • The Man from Kilos40

      It is interesting when you are on the street, walking past the the paper ads for “Safe Pain Free Abortion” and “Penis Enlargements”, and you also see the ad for “Join the Illuminati”, with a cellphone number you can call.

      For some reason I have managed to avoid the temptation.

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