Still Alive

Okay, here’s what’s happening.

We’re moving stuff out of the house and starting to prepare it for sale.  So, I got a little side tracked and the blog didn’t get posted.  Rest assured I’m alive.

Beyond that — I’ve talked of being ill.  As a result of tests I got an anerobic infection, which is hopefully now gone.  At least I finished the world’s worst antibiotic (dizziness and nausea were strong side effects.)

However the tests while negative for the big bad indicate the big bad is on the way, as it were, so there will be an operation in a couple of months.

So, sorry, not posting a real blog today.

Sigh, I guess I’ll have to let you redecorate the blog until I can post a real blog tomorrow.  Until then, kindly don’t cause too much damage.  I hope I don’t find any more elephants crammed in the closet, and do try not to spray paint the elves again.  They hate it.

178 thoughts on “Still Alive

  1. Odd – that’s not what the elves were saying when they thought no one was listening. Oh well, live and learn.

        1. Oh, you can always antagonize upperclassmen by convincing dewy-eyed freshman that tossing ice water on those poor, overheated people is the decent thing to do.

  2. Right, you heard the lady. No elephants in the closet. Didn’t say anything about triceratops.

    1. Who designed the pocket dimension for the closet? If she’s upset about there being elephants in there, it must’ve shrunk, or she’d be complaining about the coats being at the far end of the field or something, right?

      1. I think she’s just upset after stepping into a pile of elephant dung one too many times. Sarah, there’s a reason we put chore boots in the antecloset.

        1. I think the problem is the trans-dimensional gate got unlatched. Again. Folks, you gotta flip the little lever down and drop the flap over the top so the elephant can’t get to it so easily. It’s not that hard to remember, is it?

          1. Well, the problem is the elephants figured out that latch flip thingee, let themselves out to go raid the kitchen, and didn’t flip it back when the snuck back in.

            So much for elephants never forgetting.

    2. What about the fithp? Until we get a proper jail cell somewhere you gotta have some place you can lock them up, and I will not condone the use of the ladies room no more. I need to use it sometimes, and they leave an unholy mess in there.

        1. Hey, they are still taller than me, and can reach pretty far up with those multiple trunks of theirs. And they now think they are part of the human ‘herd’, so they goddamn think they have the right to go anywhere when they visit (after what Niven and Pournelle did to them. Should perhaps have just kicked them out of the Solar System instead of letting them stay).

          And here they will not listen to anybody but the Evil Space Princess because she is the leader of this ‘herd’.

          She really should not have given them the right to visit. But they kind of look like elephants, and she seems to have bit of a weak spot for elephants…

          Damn. We really do need a dungeon.

          Or is there one, somewhere?

          (Sorry. I am a bit cranky. Stepped on something in the ladies room).

      1. Well, you don’t spray glitter-glue, so I guess we can get away with that.

        I’ll skip the elephants, though – have you seen the price of peanuts these days?

  3. Triceratops in the closet? No way, they’re good eating so they belong in the giant freezer. [Very Big Dragon Grin]

    Seriously Sarah, take care. [Smile]

      1. Nah, because if she was pretty sure something bad would happen that she’d want to assure us she was alive for when she wasn’t able to post, she’d have been acting differently.

        She knows how many worry warts she’s got here who are utterly sure that if someone is a half-hour late without calling, they’ve had an accident and are dying on the side of the road somewhere, or something.

          1. … or suffered through an interminable meeting with the grievance committee of the Elves, Faeries, and Unicorns Local #73 about a spray-painting incident.

            What was she thinking, letting them unionize like that?

    1. mph. How can we be sure it’s her? Hey, “Sarah”. What do you load your trebuchet with? (that should do it…)

  4. OK. Question for those who’ve been around longer than I;

    What KIND of elves are we talking about? I’ve seen a few of the Keebler type, and I can see why spray-painting them would be a bad idea. Decorative icing is the way to go there.

    I wouldn’t dast spray paint Tolkien elves.

    Elves from, say, Bakshi’s Wizards? Spray painting’s too good for them. Bakshi too.

    1. Trailer park elves. Supposedly related to the ones down south, but no one’s volunteered to check their family trees.

      1. You don’t really need to check a family tree with so few branches.
        And it was the elves that started playing with the spray cans in the first place.

  5. If I can’t spraypaint the elves, what about sticking them on the stool over a dunking booth with the pool filled with purple paint.

  6. I think it’s because the elephants keep rifling through the coat pockets.
    Who knows what they’d find with this crowd?
    (And get better Sarah. Hopes and prayers.)

  7. It was some of Larry’s gnomes that were visiting that got going with the spraypaint, and I somehow chose to have an urgent need to be elsewhere when the opportunity came up to get between angry elvin folk and the gnomes from the ‘hood.

    Maybe if a dragon had still been around it could have ended less noisily, but all who were here had left at that point. I actually think the gnomes and elves ended up having a great time, but it was kinda hard on the furniture and bystanders.

      1. Larry’s gnomes had nothing to do with Morgoth. Of course, Larry’s orcs/goblins now work for MHI so likely would hate Morgoth. [Wink]

  8. Redecorate the blog? Quick, while she’s not looking! Game of Thrones/ Babysitter’s Club crossover fanfic! Go!

    1. I’d prefer Monster hunters/Twilight crossover. From the Monster Hunters viewpoint. We have got all those Blade in the Twilight bits, the Monster Hunters might be better.

    2. Well, there’s certainly plenty of kids to babysit in that world. Until they all get horribly murdered, along with their entire families.

      So basically, Babysitter’s Club is the ninja bodyguards.

  9. Why use spray paint when these people are available?

    I know that our hostess knows about them, but for anyone that missed the Instapundit mention, it is the perfect gift for SJW’s and Glittery Howhahs, forget about the elves.

    1. Powder coat. Then we can just sprinkle them with powder and get ’em baked.

      No — wait. That was bake them not get them baked. Nevermind. I’ve got cookies in the oven.

          1. Here too. Alvarado isn’t known for it’s humidity.
            N.O. on the other hand. Nearly melted when I worked in a warehouse there that regularly hit 120 with the humidity pushing 80-90% from time to time. If you sat still for a minute or two it was easy to see where until the wet spot dried.

            1. 😀

              Sounds delightful. 😐 Houston is more than I want, and I understand NOLA is worse…

                1. I’ll have no trouble with that one. I’ve hated Houston every time I’ve been there.

                    1. Was the processing site for my overseas contracts. Got stuck down there for days a couple of times.

                      Stick to the outskirts.

                  1. Hey, Houston’s got some good spots. Surrounded by sections that make Chtulu wonder what the h-ll he was thinking when he put THAT there, but some good spots. I used to spend the summers down there with family.

                    1. I’ve heard such, but I didn’t get to see it. We were stuck in one or another tentacle-pit part of the city.

                      Summers? On holiday? Ugh. I’m a drylander, dropped on this Earth in Lubbock. Humidity makes my spirit soggy.

        1. *mouth ajar*

          Uh — I keep running into the PG-13 banner. Might as well be speechless.

  10. …do try not to spray paint the elves again. They hate it.


    Well, I wish you’d said something a little earlier. I’ll see what I can find in the way of paint remover.

    1. I don’t think dipping them in turpentine would be any better.
      (Besides, the fumes would probably kill them.)

      1. Killing them is not the problem.

        the problem is drawing their attention then *NOT* killing them.

        Fortunately the AK has steel core bullets. You here that Lords and Ladies, STEEL–it’s made from IRON.

          1. Wow! The mental pictures! Are we still talking paint, or just brightly colored clothes?
            (If the former, the idea of their wrath makes me want to go and hide in the closet, under the elephant.)

              1. Can you see a drow searching under an elephant?
                I’m not fast enough to dodge around it. And they levitate as a natural ability. On top would not be a good position.

                1. On top is fine, so long as you take your Howdy pistol, for when they climb up and say “howdy”.

            1. I’ve recently been shopping for clothiers (Gods help me!) and for sporting equipment (stationary bike). The sheer QUANTITY of clothing in eye-searing neon colors is stunning. And, let’s face it, nobody with a skin lighter than cafe au lait looks good in this stuff. Well, some very attractive young people can look good despite it….

              It’s like dreadlocks; If you come from a certain ethnic and racial background you MAY be able to pull it off. If you are a caucasian, you are going to look like a complete pillock.


                1. Sort of like a bad burrito….

                  I remember. I was running a craft gallery that decade. And I would get these frat boys from U. Maryland in, saying “How come this is so much? I cpu;d do that!” in their neon pink shorts and neon green socks and neon orange shirts.

                  And I would think “Man, you can’t even dress yourself!”

                  1. the orange jacket in my gravitar is one of my milder colors. the other two textiles are the neon yellow/green and the leather is a red and black “normal” pattern (sorta too much power ranger though)
                    Neon in leather don’t protect (the yellow/green especially just disappears when abraded) so that is why they are not as common on the racers (Rossi uses some only as an overlay though)

                    know what. People still “Don’t See” me. BTW, having a phone in your hand makes one 90% more blind than normal

                    1. I have seen a windshield sun visor that had in reveres Hang Up and Drive. I have been nearly killed by folks on the phone. The last was a long red Ford Dually that pulled into the exit I was on. I managed to jump a curb and squeezed between the right side of the truck and a guard rail and luckily there was no one behind him for me to embed myself on.

                    2. After observing the folks who usually accidentally kill others, I’m inclined to believe the study I heard about over at TOF’s comment section.

                      They did a big to-do and predicted that, as cellphone use went up, so would accidents.
                      Didn’t happen.
                      So they went back and corrected for “after X beers” until they got the result they wanted; that did show up.

                      The idiots who almost kill you because they’re on the phone would be just as dangerous anyways– it’s just a matter of what they’re doing THIS time, and cellphones are attractive to the blankers. Hands free doesn’t help with them, either, it just means that I notice a lot more people apparently yelling at an empty seat.

                      On the way home tonight we watched a one-man accident waiting to happen– biker with those monkey-handles that never got more than five feet from the back of the car in front of him, signaled AFTER he started changing lanes, never actually looked to see if vehicles were coming, just if they were already there (cut off a pickup) and was riding the line between the two lanes going our way. Oh, it was an hour after dark, and raining.

                      He was a danger because he was driving like an idiot, not because of any device that could be involved.

                      Start looking for people who are on the phone and aren’t doing anything wrong– at least in our area, they’re a lot more common than you’d think, although if they’ve got built in hands free it can be hard to tell if they’re on the phone or just have someone in the back seat.

                    3. your first clue was the ape hangers.
                      as for accidents causes, too much of this research requires the person at fault to actually admit to being on the phone, or otherwise distracted and too often the police just go with something else. The bike I was on I got because a woman on a cell moved over into the HOV lane and took out the previous owner, then drove off, and I bought the wrecked bike for cheap. Yeah, usually the folks on the phone also tend to be bad drivers when off, but I often can tell the moment they either pick up or put down the phone.

                    4. Our area is exactly the opposite. Folks who were using hands-free, at a red light, and get t-boned by cross traffic are cited as a cellphone accident.

                      It probably is a liability vs “what they want to prove” thing.

                    5. I’m of the “If you expect them to see you and care you’re dead” school. Which is why I ride a black motorcycle wearing black leather and a black helmet. I’d turn the lights off if there was a switch for it.

                    6. With my two tone ST1100 (Black fairings put on a formerly all silver bike) and the Yellow/green neon gear I resemble some police riders in the area enough that it gets noticed. It is amazing how many folks really notice me and allow me to pass without pulling in front of me in Mansfield Texas!
                      Ride a White ST1300 and dress like you and the same will happen in Cleburne!

        1. “So I said to him, ‘Don’t you do vests in mauve?’ and he said ‘no’, so I said to him very sharp-like ‘What, don’t you do vests in mauve?’ and he said ‘No’, so I had to settle for the green, the Lincoln green, it made me mad, I’m telling you.”

          From “Bollard” by Beyond the Fringe

      1. I’m fairly sure I have seen a few of the elves around in camo paint, but I don’t think anybody else painted them, I’m fairly sure they did that themselves. They are learning.

        Not good.

            1. No actually.

              Threat #1: Dunked in bacon and thrown to chihuahua pack.

              Threat #2: Dunked in catnip and thrown to cats.

              I don’t have issues like y’all seem to…..

              1. You’re thinking Keebler elf. These are a bit bigger.
                (Though the threat might still work.)

        1. Kinda depends on where they want to disappear, doesn’t it? I mean, elves in full camo paint will disappesr in a forest, but they would anyway. Elves in full camo in a strip-mall? They’ll stand out like a SJW at a turkey shoot.

            1. I think they may think the camo paints are some sort of magic. You know, like in movies, when you sometimes get the scene where the hero is putting on the paint before he kicks ass.

                1. two good things about it were the material was so weak they went through it really fast and it was so poorly designed it was bound to be replaced quickly.

                  1. and the ‘don’t you dare iron it’ fabric tends to look ate up after a year, judging by a friend’s tour in the sandbox.

                    1. I know some called the PJs because they were about as rugged as pajamas and they looked raggedy so quickly. The more you had to wash them the faster they fell apart.
                      Then, except for the dazzle factor causing distance to be had to factor, they stick out more than blend in to the real world.

            1. My goodness. I’ve seen that picture before, and I still initially didn’t see the person… and briefly mistook the boots for a cat.

          1. Depends on the local fashion– what with the switch to digicami, there’s a lot more camo in the surplus shops. I’ve even seen hot pink camo. :shudder:

            1. Heh. I’ve got two jeans in some sort of camo patterns, blue ones and the usual green/brown ones. They were cheap (the big point) and not pink or any sort of neon color so acceptable. I also have quite a lot of military surplus camping stuff. Cheap and durable wins over fancy and expensive. Although some items have been… well, what can you expect from decades old communist era East European stuff. Some of it might have been designed as torture implements on purpose (but not expensive mistake buys at least…).

              1. Also some old Soviet military surplus or used items. A decade or so ago they were dirt cheap, now the prices have gone up a bit, seems the old stocks are starting to run out.

                1. Some of that sort of stuff might be of interest to various collectors in the U.S. Shipping costs are probably prohibitive, though, yeah?


                      Take a look at this shop. They have some weird stuff sometimes. As said, the selection of the communist era produce is not as good as it was when they started selling, but still, sometimes they do have interesting items. And they send pretty much everywhere as far as I know.

          2. Why would they stand out at a strip-mall? Doesn’t everyone wear camo at the strip-mall? Especially during hunting season? What else would you wear?

  11. WordPress has apparently had another little design tweak in the interface. Is this why it’s decided to stop sending me comments via email? Again.


      1. They seem to do their damndest improve the user experience good and hard.


        But, hey! Variety is the spice of life, right?

    1. Seriously, give up on the e-mail thing, get the whole WordPress account thing set up. Then you can have a little widget in the upper right with all your replies in it, and a dashboard screen showing you the entries with the most recent comments on them.

      (I did the Gravatar thing first, then WP bought them out, and so I ended up with a WP account, and some confusing login issues for a while.)

      1. I’ve got the WP account, and I get the little notifications (is how I knew about this one) but I came to rely (overmuch) on the email notifications. They’re particularly handy for keeping up with a topic when I’m out and about and linked by my phone. (The WP tool bar eats up screen space)

        I know, giving up is the rational thing. But — windmills!

        On the dashboard screen, is there somewhere you can get the new comments (non-reply to you ones) or just notification of where the latest comments are?

        1. It’s not perfect, but the old Dashboard (black bar down the left) has “Comments I’ve made” that will list posts that you’ve commented on, and show the last comment you made, one before it, and those after it unless there are too many (then it will skip all but the last three). The posts are sorted in the order of the most recent last comment, so if an old thread gets a new comment, It will jump to the top. Then I use that nifty script that highlights new comments when I go visit the post.

  12. Someone put some plastic flamingos on the lawn.

    Don’t worry. They’ve all come to life and flown down to the lake.

    1. my great uncle hates lawn flamingos. He owned a house on a river and the family across from him loved the blighty things so he paid some local kids to swim across and move the flamingos in that yard to be hidden behind trees from him when he looked out his living-room window It worked for most of the summer, then one day they got moved into veiw again. but he was only going to be there a few weeks (He snowbirded out to Phoenix) so he didn’t bother having them moved again.
      As a joke Mom gave him some Flamingo christmas tree lights one year.

        1. JP

          Is it sad that I read that as now the first go around, and it wasn’t until you pointed it out I noticed.


  13. I am so sorry you’re having to go through this, and while you’re packing up, too. OTOH, at least they’ve found the problems, and it sounds like there’s a good chance that this will all get fixed. Wish it could be sooner – you’ve got so much on your plate. But I hope this means we can expect you to be pain-free in the future, and that would be wonderful news (include much knocking-on-wood here, so as not to jinx anything).

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