TANSTAAFL DAY 11 — Now with itty bitty kitties — and a free ccby picture

Posted on by accordingtohoyt

Still moving up!

THE GOAL IS $50,000

the counter stands at: $26,358.95 USD(Updated at least every 8 hours, more often if i happen to be here.)

IT ENDS JULY 16TH.

I thank you, my cats thank you, and this random kitten thanks you too!

I love this community very much, but not like this, because that would be weird:

More like this, because you’re the best imaginary friends a writer could have. (What? I have never seen most of you in real life!)

Yes, okay sure, we all know when I’m relying heavily on GIFS I am not quite sane. Blame the last two years, but be sure the itty bitty kitty committee thanks you:

Meanwhile, back at the Hoyt ranch (You only think I’m joking. I need to go weed the onion patch, proving on retourne toujours… to our earliest tasks (that was my first chore for the household at… 4? 5?)

Why I am doing this!

Depends on what you mean by this. If you mean the kitten infliction on innocent bystanders, I’d claim my being slightly dopey at 11 days of fundraiser which — as the people who hang out here for years know — goes thoroughly against my instincts and nature. I come from a time and place where you a) don’t talk about money, because that’s rude. b) don’t ask to be paid for your work, because if you have to ask, it means you’re not worth it.

Why, yes, indeed! That has served me amazingly in my writing career. (What? Did the snort/giggle give away the sarcasm?)

The truth is that more and more a lot of writing is moving to systems of patronage. I’m not going to do that for my fiction (if I do it will be a whole series and I’ll use kickstarter or indie go like a normal human being.) But the blog and the fiction fandom are barely connected (maybe 10%) and I don’t want to give up the blog.

Also, having studied business models, I came to the conclusion I’d be stuck where I am and falling further behind every year unless I delegated some work. So far volunteer helpers aren’t working super-well. (I’ll be honest, people don’t work well for free.) So, I’ll have to pay. Which hopefully (if my business doesn’t collapse completely in what’s ahead) will also help me get some of my very talented and competent crowd through. (Hopefully. Whether the business collapses depends on how much every day life keeps going on around the crisis ahead. I’m betting on “normal life goes on around the fringes because that’s what tends to happen. Seriously. And as Jerry day life often reminded me, properly done writing is a counter-average economy profession. We do best when things are down.)

If the blog funds, or close enough, I intend to use the funds to put out blog collection of essays (under S. A. Hoyt, so as not to clutter my fiction page. If I were doing this now, I would have a different name.) I also intend to get more help with editing, to get someone to keep me on track, so I don’t forget things like anthology invites, and don’t flow past deadlines with abandon. Also of urgent need is what my younger son calls a sys admin (Not that he’s volunteering to do it. He has his own plans and course of life.) to redo and maintain my writer website, this site, honestly probably Mad Genius Club, and maybe even start up a reborn Azounding, to promote indie writers to the right of Lenin (I already have an admin for that, if I can pay him.) There are also plans for anthologies via inkstain, but that’s a different company. This too, btw, would help some people get through what’s ahead. (Yeah, I’m sappy for a libertarian, ain’t I? I’d like to make it through this, but I want my friends to make it too.)

I might or might not be in this picture.

Ahem, anyway:

THE INCENTIVES AND TIERS:

Tier 1– $10 or more – A shout out on my blog, all with all other the supporters, by name, in one massive “Thank you” post. [Jokey or offensive names will not be included at author’s discretion.]

Tier 2– $25 or more – Email jpg of certificate with funny fish saying “I Was Carped at according to hoyt.com” and a Certificate of being a member of Hoyt’s Huns, cultural wars sapper battalion, in good standing.

Tier 3– $60 or more – Exclusive ebook collection of USAian stories. (Including a new, original, never published story.) Estimated delivery August 2023

Tier 4– $100 or more – Your name will appear in a mass death/other mass event/list in one of Sarah’s books. [estimated delivery up through July 2023. All indie books, as no others are guaranteed.]

Tier 5– $150 or more – A sound file of Sarah saying “Moose and Squirrel.”

Tier 6 – $250 or more – Will send a signed copy of trade paperback Gentleman takes a chance and one large postcard with book covers, also signed. (USPS- continental US only. All others, let’s talk.) [estimated delivery Sept 2022]

Tier 7 – $350 or more – Three signed books (of our choice), plus two extra items from “Sarah’s Garage”, (also of our choice) which might very well be a small rubber fish. (You’ve been warned.) USPS only. Continental U.S. only [estimated delivery Sept 2022]

Tier 8 – $500 or more – Personalized tuckerization. You will become your very own zany character, with at least a line or two of dialogue, and physical description. Physical safety and life of character not guaranteed. If you perish, it will NOT (repeat not) be in a mass death event or a list of other kinds.  [estimated delivery up through July 2023. All indie books, as no others are guaranteed.] [Jokey or offensive names, descriptions and personalities will not be included at author’s discretion.]

Tier 9 – $1000 or more – A CHOICE OF:

Option 1 -Will read the first 10 pages and outline of your novel and provide timely critique, with the understanding that I am not infallible. (A skype, zoom or other video call to discuss the work for an hour or so.) [estimated delivery Winter 2022 – Spring 2023]

Option 2 – Large box of ten signed books, plus items ranging from a con badge, to a mini dinosaur skeleton or a print of Sarah’s original art, or other items from Sarah’s garage. USPS only. Continental U.S. only [estimated delivery Sept 2022]

Option 3 – Signed copy of Sarah’s old copyedited or page-proof manuscripts. [estimated delivery Fall 2022] (5 limit.)

Tier 10 – $5000 or more – You will become a major character on one of my books, and I’ll try to reflect your appearance, and chosen personality.  [estimated delivery up through July 2023. All indie books, as no others are guaranteed.] [Jokey or offensive names, descriptions and personalities will not be included at author’s discretion. You don’t get to have someone else be an offensive character. (Sorry!) Your actions will be altered to serve the plot if needed.] – Limit 5. (You’ll be informed if this has been claimed, and given a chance for a refund or of a comparable reward.)

Tier Insane – $25000 or more – My husband and I will travel to a city in the continental US and have dinner with you and your plus one.  (Continental US only.) – Limit ONE. [Delivery up to July 2023.] (You’ll be informed if this has been claimed, and given a chance for a refund or of a comparable reward.)

ALL TIERS INCLUDE ALL PREVIOUS TIERS EXCEPT FOR THOSE THAT ARE NUMBER LIMITED.

If you want to be thanked/mentioned by a name different from your regular one, please email to: bookpimping at outlook dot com.

TO DONATE:

DONATE TO ACCORDING TO HOYT TAANSTAFL DAYS (The previous words are a link!)

FOR CHECK DONATIONS:

Sarah A. Hoyt

Goldport Press

304 S Jones Blvd #6771

Las Vegas, NV  89107

THIS IS PINNED TO THE TOP OF THE BLOG. THE DAILY POST APPEARS BELOW THIS.

This Picture was created by Sarah A. Hoyt and is released under CC BY

CC BY-active link to explain rights.

No, I have NO clue what’s up with translucent suits. But hey, pinups….

37 thoughts on “TANSTAAFL DAY 11 — Now with itty bitty kitties — and a free ccby picture”

  1. Hi,

    Look for the package I sent you on Saturday to Goldport Press today.
    I just ran the tracking number with USPS and it says,
    “Your item has been delivered to an agent for final delivery in LAS VEGAS, NV 89107 on July 11, 2022 at 9:29 am.”
    Wow! The post office moved much more quickly than I expected 🙂

    The kittens are cuuuute. Hugs.

      1. Hi,

        No worries. I just wanted to let you that your package seems to have made it across the country.

  3. From LinkedIn:

    A father said to his daughter

    “You just graduated, this is a car I bought a while ago… It is a few years old. But before I give it, take it to a car dealer in the city and sell it , see how much they offer.”

    The girl came back to her father and said: “They offered 1000 euros because it looks very old”

    The father said: Hold it and take it to the 2nd hand car dealer.
    The girl returns to her father and says: “The pawn shop offered 100 euros because it is a very old car and lots of investments are needed to drive it again”

    The father asked his daughter to join a passionate car club with experts and show them the car.

    The girl drove the car to the passionate car club, turned and said to her father: “Some people in the club offered me 100,000 euros because it is a rare car that is in good condition, with great capabilities and super difficult to find.”

    Then the father said, “I wanted to let you know that you are not worth anything if you are not in the right place.”

    If you are not appreciated, do not be angry, that means you are in the wrong place. “Don’t stay in a place where no one sees your value.”

      1. confused kitty head tilt Naugah? I thought they went extinct during the Great Furniture Rush of the 1940s-70s.

            1. I would note that vinyl would make excellent dragons. Had a friend in high school that did stuffed animals including some rather sci-fi/ fantasy ones. She did dragons but in cloth, vinyl was beyond the capabilities of the sewing machine she used for some of the work, and leather was also beyond it and to darned expensive (in 1978 not sure how much but lots more than remainder cloth 🙂 ). If you want you can adopt an official nauga here … https://www.naugahyde.com/dolls/ a little steep for the custom ones but still not bad for the smaller ones.

        2. Much as thed Fauxes have been made extinct because of the demand for Faux leather and Faux fur . . .

    1. I wasn’t going to say it, but that was my thought. Not the political kind and not my kind, but they do look lizardish from the navel down.

      2. Yes, As it happens, I’m partial to the classic Louisville Slugger.

        But seriously, Yes, bats are cool. Skeeter eaters for the win!

        1. Bring on the bats. I always thought Flying Foxes (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pteropus) were kind of cool/cute. Younger daughter did a quarter in Melbourne Australia and they are apparently common there. Apparently having mobs of large bats swarming about was not her idea of a good evening 🙂 and makes them far less appealing.

          1. On the opposite end of the “Cool” spectrum– FLAPPY MICE!

            How can you not get at least a little cute out of flappy mice?!?!

            1. I don’t know. Smaller size bats are less cute than their giant cousins. I’ve had many an interaction with bats in my youth, and we had one in the house one time. Our brute squad cat Mac (physics item cat 10 Kilos, spherical and nearly friction-less due to the fur) saw it and tried to grab it. Amazingly he got 4 – 4.5′ in the air which was darned impressive for a bowling ball of a cat. The landing was also quite impressive sound wise, after 4-5 tries he sort of slunk off I think the landing hurt…we finally managed to shoo the bat out some french doors at the back of the house

              1. There are bats in the neighborhood. I figured it out one evening while pondering how its wings were rippling. . . .

                It was the ones that were swooping down low and changing direction faster than a bird could that were unnerving.

                1. I think that was younger daughters issue with the flying foxes in/near Melbourne. One of them munching peacfully on a banana is cute. A half dozen flying and swooping about in the dark is unnerving…

  10. I thought lizards as well. But what is blondie doing with her right hand.

  11. Hi Sarah
    I just sent a donation.
    I remember years ago I used to subscribe to a couple newspapers, and also weekly periodicals in order to be informed (misinformed?).
    Lately I’ve decided to try to spend at least as much as I used to, but send money only to online “bloggers” who I read and appreciate.
    You certainly fit the bill.
    Thanks for putting in the effort Sarah, you have no idea how much it is appreciated.

    1. Just check their cookbook section in their library before you interact with them too deeply. If you find “To Serve Man” run like heck, but it may already be too late. Also offers of large hot tubs made of cast iron are also dubious, especially if they start scenting the water with herbs and root veggies. These checks should probably go into ANY first contact protocol.

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