The Rain of Frog

Posted on by Sarah A. Hoyt

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Henrietta Ford was not the sort of woman who had hallucinations.

In fact, hallucinations—which she didn’t have!—were some of the many things that seemed to make life far more interesting for other women. For instance, take her mother.  Her mother had dreams. Prophetic dreams.  She’d come to Henrietta in the morning, from the time Henrietta — Rietta to her friends — had turned fourteen and say “Henry” — which of course was what mother called her — “I dreamed you had married a prince.”

This story is now published as part of this collection:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09W3WBJYJ

94 thoughts on “The Rain of Frog”

  4. I liked the story very much. Thanks for sending and posting it.

    If you wouldn’t mind an editorial comment, though, there’s a problem with one of the early sentences: “In fact hallucinations were one of the many things that seemed to make life far more interesting for other women, which she didn’t have.”

    This seems to suggest in a literal sense that it’s “other women” that she doesn’t have, and I’m sure that’s not what is intended. Maybe it would be easy enough to recast to “In fact, hallucinations—which she didn’t have!—were some of the many things that seemed to make life far more interesting for other women.”

      3. I’m going to read it to the toad that lives in my basement.

        At least, once I stop laughing! Well done.

        2. Right there, we’re more in the realm of horny toads, which are in fact actually very ugly lizards, so much more applicable.

          1. Excuse me, horn frogs eat fire ants, which is a service to humanity. The same cannot be said of certain politicians.

              1. TCU. Texas Christian University. Fear. The. Frog. *makes hornfrog finger sign*

                Sib and Sib-in-law are both alums.

                1. Friend that I rode with in Texas, has/had season Tickets to the football team. Former co-worker’s stepson was going there (Equine stuff iirc), and step-niece almost went there, but went for UNT instead, met her hubby there. Horn Frogs is better mascot than “Mean Green”. Yosemite Sam even prefers them (~_^)

    2. No doubt the frog likes it that it’s not one of the ones where he gets thrown against the wall, or beheaded.

    1. I can imagine Norvell Page (of pulp fame) titling a story “Death-Rain of the Frog King”.

  11. In the fullness of time, they had three little boys who liked hiking and climbing trees and who were forewarned magic was real, and they should never, under any circumstances, do tax preparation for witches.

    ❤

  14. >> “and they should never, under any circumstances, do tax preparation for witches.”

    Considering that our tax code is evil witchery in and of itself, you’d think they could handle it.

    1. “When people said the tax code was arcane, i didn’t think it could actually be used to do spells.”

      (sounds like a great first line for a story)

  15. “she bent down to kiss a frog who wore a crown — and who looked very surprised at the eminent osculation.”

    BTW – be very careful about kissing frogs; they’re highly prone to slipping you more than a little tongue.
    –

      1. I’m not entirely sure; I would imagine for a frog to be smooched by a human would be a distinctly “outstanding or remarkable” experience.

        But I suspect you are likely correct.

        Courtesy The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, 5th Edition
        –

  16. When I saw the title and image I was sure it would be about Pepe and related memes.

    never, under any circumstances, do tax preparation for witches.

    But wouldn’t the IRS qualify? That would present quite the conundrum.

  17. Could have gone worse for him. The witch could have turned him into a spring peeper and had him sit for hours with his tail in cold muddy water screaming for a female’s attention…

  19. As long as I’ve looked it up …

    Edward Everett Horton’s voice always rouses fond childhood reminiscences.

  22. This made my day. Thanks Sarah! Was getting down on myself and overwhelmed by the many things that need doing today. Chores, writing, freelance. And very very soon taxes!

    *flails Kermit style*

  23. Now I’m going to have this earworm for the rest of the day… serves you right. 😀

  26. Lovely! Really liked the fact that you used the word telecommuting in the story, since that how hubby works.

  34. Reminds me of the Armitage Stories. Which is to say quirky and pleasant, with people you’d want to know, and kind of a tiny perfect petit four of a plot.

    If you’ve never read Joan Aiken’s short stories, give them a try: they’re good fun. Her children’s books range from terrific to “meh” ( mostly the later ones) and if you go for the adult novels, I didn’t send you. But the short stories! I reread them every few years.

    Side question for Mrs. Hoyt: Why She’d moved out of mom and dad’s house — as she should have — at twenty five -?

    Not a complaint, and it IS a truism, but whyfor? I perceive “If I want to do something useful” it’s clear I have to leave town,” and setting up one’s new household when marrying. But how come the general should? I suspect there’s something there.

  42. That was indeed a very sweet story and wonderful change of pace. You can bet I’m going to share it with my grandchildren. 🙂

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    1. Yes, that was a bit of brilliance. I wonder whether Walt Simonson ever tires of doing sketches of Asgard’s Frog Price?


      I am suffused with a vague sense there is an Underdog cartoon to be referenced. But I am not going to search for it, not today. I already pissed away too much time selecting the above picture. There are unboxing videos of this thing!
      –

      1. Not plane or bird or even frog, just little old me, Underdog. I can hear Wally Cox saying that. Loved that silly show as a kid. My Dad also would laugh at parts, although not always what I thought was funny. I suspect there was some byplay betwen Sweet Polly Purebreed and Shoeshine boy/Underdog that a 5-8 year old would not get :-).

  47. Loved this. I hope you make a collection and let me throw some money at you for it!

  51. This one caught me by surprise. I wasn’t intending to read anything “long” and I kept thinking I needed to stop and move on – but I loved it so much I just couldn’t. Great story!

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