Cranky Saturday

So, two or three days ago (seems forever) I sprained my ankle, so I’m now extremely cranky, because I have to stay off it, which means I can’t get rid of the crankiness by walking around or even cleaning the house, which DESPERATELY needs it.

Apparently the very sedate trip to seem the Vikings exhibit in the DMNS yesterday was a bad idea, as I’m worse today.  The exhibit was great, btw,  but so dense with information, that I would like to go again, and will try to persuade husband to accompany me.  Well, honestly, I could have DONE without the 2 females about 10 years older than I explaining to each other how powerful female Vikings were and how patriarchy was the fault of Christianity, but I managed to get out without giving them a grand rant so that’s okay.  I mean, seriously, what is wrong with “progressives” who continuously project their ideals onto the most unlikely past civilizations?  Progressing towards pre-history again?

There is an article on PJM which RES has linked in the comments, but if you haven’t seen it, it’s here:

What if we were invaded by aliens?

Meanwhile, I leave with this EXTREMELY dubious personality test.  Note it classified me as a Liger which is not, to my knowledge, magical in any shape or size.  Eh.  “Magic” must be different these days.  And also they should get off my lawn.

 

Which Magical Creature Are You?

221 responses to “Cranky Saturday

  1. Silly test. I am a wallaby. How much more magical could anyone be?

    • Professor Badness

      A flying wallaby? That would be more magical.

      • Wallabies can fly, but refuse to indulge in TSA foolishness.


        Wallabies, like Porco Rosso, prefer the romance of classic propeller craft.

        • Sensible wallabies! You could be more magical if you came from Magical Australia (pace Rachel Griffin) however.

          It a a very silly test, because any fool can perceive I am hobbit, albeit a gargantuan one. Not a Dragon–! Not even, the Leviathan of Books, because I give mine away (preferably on my birthday) Silly test-maker.

          • If I came from Magickal Australia, which I of course do not, I could never admit it (not that I do) lest my cover be blown.

          • That was where my head went.

            Maybe I need to reread the three presently available while waiting for the next … yes … that sounds like a plan …

  2. Sorry to hear about the ankle. As one who has been there, take my advice and adhere to standards of care. It is impossible to not favour a sore foundation joint, which means you will walk funny which risks blowing out a knee or putting a kink in your spine, which is not anything you want to experience.

    Hope you get well soon.

    • Amen to getting it better before doing too much. I’ve had soft tissue damage to both knees and ankles and then I broke my right ankle in three places. Now have OA in my knees and weather sensing in my ankle. If one goes, the others start to hurt unless I treat it right because I limp which puts the force on another weak spot until all of them are going.

  3. Christopher M. Chupik

    “What if we were invaded by aliens?”

    If?

  4. The Vikings exhibit is awesome. I saw it with friends when it was here in Cincinnati, about 8 months ago, along with the Roskilde 6 Viking ship.

    • how powerful female Vikings were and how patriarchy was the fault of Christianity

      They had power only because their men were off invading other lands, looting their homes and raping their women. Then they brought home slaves to do the hard work of farming to keep those empowered viking women fed.

      And no, there were NO “female vikings” to speak of, just as there were virtually no female pirates. “Viking” was an occupation (not an ethnicity) not readily accepting of women, especially as longboats lacked privies. Which brings to mind the issue of Viking environmental degradation …

      • Also female slaves. Guess what they might have been used for. So yes, their wives might have been pretty powerful, but it was not exactly female friendly otherwise. Plus not fun for the new brides who had to live under the power of that matriarch for who knows how long until she maybe got her chance, if her husband had been one of the heirs to start with, managed to stay alive and keep his position long enough.

        I seem to be a dragon, btw. (Looks at self) What a surprise. Well, for the moment. I reserve the right to re-identify as something else. Whatever species, I am a woman. Women have the right to change their minds about these things. (Sniff and toss of head – okay that works better with hair, I think)

      • Yep, I know. The same way as I know that “they weren’t really looters, they were farmers” is bullshit. Any culture where if you die in bed you go to Hell (which is not that different from Hel) is not a culture of peaceful farmers.

        • Vikings were the only culture where men went off shopping while the women stayed home. Of course they rarely paid for their goods, so I suppose they were shoplifters.

          Had to watch an Acura ad to learn this old bear is a dragon.

          • beginning to suspect we’re all going to end up dragons based on three specific responses.

            • ok , ‘most of us are going to be dragons’
              i think independence + hunting may be most of it.

              • It’s not just those two. I had both and got the appropriate response of werewolf.

                • ‘Alexandria’ instead of ‘outdoors’?

                • Werewolf might be dragon who chose Nocturnal and no real desire to heights in their calculations.

                  • Yep, I flipped a single answer, from indifferent about heights, to I Love Heights, and got Dragon instead.

                    • I gave the actual true for me answer to the heights one – fear them, pretty badly. Not very dragonic response. Got dragon anyway.

                    • Well, all of these are a balancing thing, a certain number of points for this response towards these results, and it gives you whichever is the highest. Just means you had a lot more dragonic responses in other questions than I did and I’m right on the line.

                    • I’d like to know what all the possible results are. While I am hardly surprised at not getting “unicorn” it is a bit jarring to not get anything at all hooved. I even went back and tried again, changing an answer or three… and mermaid? Not bloody likely. As in, even werewolf is more likely than that – and that’s about as likely as a beautiful Pontiac Aztek.

                    • Ah, and I managed to get Liger if I went to the Vampire/Dragon route and flipped from Neverending Story to Napoleon Dynamite. Even with napoleon dynamite on the other route, I still hit Werewolf.

                    • I still had Neverending story.

                    • Heh, Back to the thing where each choice leans a little more towards one or the other. There’s likely enough other choices that pushed you away from werewolf/vampire/dragon that you didn’t need Napoleon Dynamite.

                    • I didn’t use “Neverending Story” as my favorite (the movie exceeds my “cheesy sappy” quotient somewhat) but I would have to confess that I used a picture of the Empress from the movie when I made a t-shirt for my daughter.

                      The t-shirt said “Daddy’s little Future Grand Empress of the Universe”. For a t-shirt like that, I couldn’t use a standard picture of a princess. I had to find an Empress.

                    • It was the only one I’d ever heard of…

                  • I picked Yosemite, hunting, independence, meat-eating, and gardening, and Halloween party; and ‘not particularly’ on heights; ended up with Vampire.

                    You are a vampire! You are most productive in the night time hours and not really much of a morning person. You are attractive and know how to get what you want with your looks and charm. You are also fierce and independent and people should not get on your bad side!

                    • Hawaii, Hunting, independence, meat-eating, prefer cold, Tiger, don’t like parties, blue, eating, kindness, [not really/love heights], neverending story, and that gave me werewolf the first time, Dragon the second time, and Vampire the third time. I think they must be putting some sort of random element in.

                    • Ah, probably because I picked Yosemite the first time. Small variations switching the results.

                • thewerewife

                  Lucky you! I scored Mermaid. I mean, WTH? A freaking MERMAID?! For the Love of Life Orchestra ….
                  On the bright side, my required ad was a trailer for Ready Player One, and it looks like a VERY faithful adaptation!

              • Yep. That and, “don’t really like parties”

            • I’m apparently a mermaid, seemingly just because of their list of possible activities I chose swimming.

      • Randy Wilde

        Response #1

        Little-known fact… those “female Vikings” we’re actually wabbits in drag. Photographic evidence:

      • Randy Wilde

        Response #2:

        I dunno, some of those female Vikings are pretty powerful, I know they could get me to do just about anything… if that’s not power, what is?

        https://tse4.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.Y9I8wuMJl8fw1BArYXhcrwEsDI&pid=15.1

  5. I be a VEREVOLFFFFF!!

  6. Hmm, it says Werewolf. I suppose I should avoid hanging out with Larry Correia.

  7. How can I be a mermaid. Several of the references the description made were choices completely opposite of my answers.

  8. Get a pillow. Sit on it and allow ankle to heal. Since you are sitting there anyway, WRITE.

  9. Sorry to hear about the ankle. Almost three years ago I broke mine. I was in a boot for weeks. Then I had to do physical therapy.

    As for the test– Mermaid… which was so opposite from me (outgoing and friendly???? hahaha) that I suspect it. The only thing right was that I do love the ocean and seafood. 😀

  10. I did see the exhibit in Roskilde, Denmark more than a decade ago. It was fun and I wish I could go back (but not likely).

    • Roskilde 6 is sort-of touring with the Viking exhibit, but if I understand not all of the museums hosting the exhibit have room for it. It made its North American debut in Cincinnati; perhaps Sarah can tell us if it is in Denver.

  11. John Prigent

    Apparently I’m a werewolf too. OK, that solves my problem of what to be in the Diner and also means I’ll feel at home if I ever get to Goldport. It’s a pity that Captain Angua is spoken for, but since I’m a rather old werewolf I wouldn’t be able to keep up with the Watch anyway.

  12. I wasn’t able to make it to the Viking exhibit when it was here in Cincy, but I heard it was good.

    And I don’t think werewolf fits me too well, either.

    • Is that the same which was in Chicago, the Field Museum, in the summer of 2015? If so I saw it. Not half bad, but considering where I live I have seen better, some of the permanent exhibits in Sweden. And I am maybe going to visit this place on my summer holiday, since it is kind of almost next door (or if not this summer, then next year, considering it has just opened it should be there for a while):

      http://www.vikingaliv.se/en/

      • Of course I am far more interested in what was in Finland during that time. The Vikings get far too much attention, I think. (Well, the damn attention hoggers DID leave more material behind, especially things in written documents, than my ancestors… at least they did admit they got their asses kicked by Finns in a couple of attempts to come robbing here. Wrote it down themselves.)

        • Not surprised they wrote it down themselves. In the rape-and-loot business, it’s REAL important to have a record of who’s gonna kick your butt if you try it on them.

  13. Dragon. Given that some friends went through the Dragonomicon and pronounced me a Copper Dragon, I’m not really surprised.

    I wonder if the “inject SJWness into All The Things!!!” is part of humans’ desire to create roots for something that is purely modern. Like the neo-pagans who aver that their flavor of beliefs really does come from Neolithic goddess-worshippers who preserved their traditions secretly for 10,000s of thousands of years, or the medieval and renaissance monarchs who discovered that their ancestry goes back to Aeneas and Brutus of Troy as well as Adam, Eve, and Charlemagne. (Their odds are a little better with Charlemagne, given the number of wives, concubines, and other ladies he associated with over the decades).

    • Oh yea– I’ve heard what Sarah has to say about Charlemagne and Europe (i.e. we are probably all from his line) 🙂 Seriously though– the need to believe that “secret” rituals were passed down for thousands of years seems to be a human instinct. *pointing at the Greeks and other ancients

    • SheSellsSeashells

      I used to be on a long-form roleplay list set in the Anita Blake ‘verse (*before* the author went nuts). I used to get the giggles at the statistically improbable number of “family tradition” Wiccans with millenia-old rituals handed down in secret. Especially considering that my boring Christian self knew more about Wicca than at least half of them.

    • Giggle or cry? Started to rain while I was at the library so I bought a carry-out bag. Told the librarian to pick a design. He picked a dragon. I have a sinking feeling that my next major project is going to be a fantasy novel that draws on Song (or Sung) Dynasty culture and environmental history. And yes, it has nagas and dragons in it.

    • “Their ancestry goes back to Aeneas and Brutus of Troy as well as Adam, Eve, and Charlemagne”

      Er, according to tradition, doesn’t everyone’s ancestry go back to Adam and Eve?

    • I’ve noticed the “desire to create roots for something that is purely modern” seems particularly strong in the feminists. There seems to be a cottage industry in perfect pacifist matriarchal societies destroyed by the coming of the evil male-dominated Christianity.

      • Well of course. It’s part of how they claim legitimacy, much like the monarchs of old–counter the claim that you’re creating something new and untried (and, therefore, probably a bad idea) by saying that you’re re-creating something old that was destroyed.

        • But then again, ironically enough, if it’s an old thing that was destroyed…there’s a small probability that it was destroyed for a (potentially very good) reason or two….

      • As a rule the “perfect pacifist matriarchal society” is the one before the one that person making the claim knows we have records about.

      • Well of course — just look at how Christian society has abused women: demanding they swath themselves in figure disguising cloths, refusing to let them pursue education, secluding them in female-only enclaves, denying them political voice and demanding mutilation of their fiddly-bits!

        Or is it that Christian dominated societies impose the terrible burden of having to earn their livings, make choices that strain their abilities, such as which man/woman/building/geographic feature to marry, have to negotiate salaries when the whole topic is embarrassing, and whether to display their nipples in public?

        I didn’t buy the program and now cannot keep up.

      • Mostly because they know perfect pacifist matriarchal anything is impossible in the future, so they must claim it in the past…

        • why is everybody so hipped on pacifism? It screams Victim to me. Of course if you want to show that you’re a victim it’s good.

          • To play devil’s advocate here, there might be a type of civilized person who, imagining if a scenario in which he or she were to fall asleep at the wheel of a car and kill some innocent, would rather be the one hit, than the one driving.

            And they’re mal-educated.

          • I have no problem with armed pacifism — the type where I leave you in peace, if you leave me in peace.

            Which goes contrary to what many people seem to think is pacifism, to be sure: I beat you over the head with morality claims (sometimes enforced with armed police and soldiers) if I don’t like how you’re living, so long as you leave me in peace…

            • Pacifism, in the manner commonly advocated, always strikes me as an unrealistic reliance upon the kindness of strangers.

        • SheSellsSeashells

          One of my favorite Florence King quotes, paraphrased is “Anybody who has ever heard a snippy voice declare ‘I’m not throwing the ball to *her*, while *her* is standing unguarded directly under the basket, knows why women in combat is a terrible idea.”

          • I don’t know that that’s an artifact of female biologically-based behavior or cultural, to be honest. I’ve met women who were really good team players, and I’ve known women who were the sort who’d tackle their own teammate because they dared wear the same outfit to the game, in order to prevent that teammate from scoring a point. Then, there were some whose exhibited behavior seemed to depend on the phase of the moon, and who were entirely unpredictable to a degree that flatly boggles the mind.

            I do suspect that if it were a biologically-based impulse, though, that it could be trained out of exhibited behavior. So long as said training techniques were left unlimited in some severe cases… Couple of ladies I know would probably need severe electro-shock therapy to dissuade them from making team-kills on their friends and acquaintances.

            Observationally, I think that while it may be true that male intelligence in the human species is a lot more variable than female, the converse is true when it comes to certain behavioral aspects related to teamwork with women. They’re a lot wider in range between “stab you in the back for looking at you funny while you’re trying to score” and “willingly die of thirst so that other teammates can get a drink of water out of the cooler”. Guys are gonna concentrate in the middle of that range, same as the girls usually concentrate in the mid-range for intelligence. Likewise, where you’ll have a wider range of male intelligence values, you’ll have a similar wider range of women whose emotional/teamwork values are far out on the outside of the curve in both directions…

            Watch group projects in schools, for examples: The ones who wind up doing all the work when paired up with the sociopathic parasites who don’t ever contribute to group projects are usually going to be a select class of women; the average guy is going to look a situation like that and say “Screw this…”, while those girls on the outer edge of the empathy and teamwork curve are going to go ahead and die on that group project hilltop. And, meanwhile, there are going to be a bunch of girls doing the exact opposite, actively doing nothing for the group. Majority of the guys are gonna be in that semi-apathetic middle ground, going along to get along…

            Or, at least, that’s what I’ve observed, over the years. Your anecdotal evidence and experience may vary from mine.

            • A couple of years back, I saw something about bullying behavior in female primates. The interesting part was that a victim of bullying, if sufficiently stressed, will stop ovulating, giving a horrible evolutionary reason for why bullying exists.

              So there are, in fact, some biological reasons for that type of behavior. Mind you, a lot of people are smarter than their biologies, or should be.

            • SheSellsSeashells

              Which is fascinating; I’d never made that observation about variable emotional behavior in women, but it rings pretty true. I survived some pretty nasty intra-girl power plays in middle school (didn’t win; survived) and while fascinating from an anthropological standpoint, I’m glad to be out of ’em. (Mostly. Observations are coming in handy for giving my now-middle-school daughter a combat guide. 🙂

            • ….That’s a fascinating possibility.

      • Which is ‘effin strange, because most of the people who were forcefully Christianized bitched about how effeminate the Christians were… I mean, for the love of it all, they preached all that lovey-dovey stuff, outlawed good honest human sacrifice, and just generally didn’t impress anyone as being all that manly, at least compared to the majority of the pagan religions they wiped out. Methinks these people are utter morons with no historical background whatsoever.

        I don’t have much respect at all for the intellectual honesty or brainpower I’ve seen demonstrated by most of the feminists. What passes for scholarship over there seems more like a lot of wishful thinking, and delusion.

        First time reality slaps them in the face, the majority of them are going to suffer so much cognitive dissonance that they’re going to be still standing there in shock when the blast wave rolls over them, and wind up dead, dead, dead.

        • What passes for scholarship over there seems more like a lot of wishful thinking, and delusion.

          Michael Bellesiles and Nancy Maclean say you are the delusional one.

        • Mmm, yeah, on human sacrifice. I think that’s why the majority of these fools are so pro-abortion, at times.

          Sorry; still kind of on a train of thought that I thought I’d mostly gotten out from my most recent blog post but apparently not. It’s still chewing on me.

          • I’ve thought about that. It’s a very old impulse of mankind, particularly when you feel guilty for how good you have it. “Sh*t, I’d better feed the gods some red meat, or they’ll come after mine.”
            And these people are all instinctive pagans, meaning they believe vaguely in animated forces, history and so on. Particularly linked with “Babies must die so we keep gaia happy.”

            • I have to admit that that thought is something that hasn’t occurred to me, that there’s a lot of continuity between the modern thought process/impulse behind making widespread abortion available and the old traditions of infant-sacrifice and exposure.

              I shouldn’t wonder that there wouldn’t be a very dark modern fantasy story-line in there, somewhere, with Margaret Sanger cast as the last high priestess of Ba’al, and her whole Planned Parenthood cult being a modernized version of what was going on in those temples around Carthage, only targeting the potential children of “undesirables”, used to propitiate the dark gods in the stead of the children of the actual beneficiaries. It would be darkly humorous to cast the Carthaginians as a somewhat better class of infanticides, having the honesty to sacrifice their own, and letting them be born in the first place, instead of snuffing out the life-force in the womb. Which one could posit was more powerful, being closer to the “spark” that initiated it all.

              Could even become a pretty persuasive piece of propaganda, that–a la Harriet Beecher Stowe’s Uncle Tom’s Cabin. I’d never write it, though I’ll happily throw the idea out there for someone else with an ability to “write dark” without taking up heavy drinking to do so…

              • Sanger and Alesteir Crowley were somewhat contemporaneous.

                • I wouldn’t have minded having a beer or two with Crowley; some of his writing is… Interesting. Sanger, on the other hand? Only way I’d be in vicinity of that nasty piece of work with a beer in my hand is if it were at her ritual burning at the stake…

                  Crowley, for all his reputation for weirdness, wasn’t what I’d describe as an evil man. Strange, yes; evil? Not so much. Sanger? I’ve had a strong distaste for that woman ever since I read my first tranche of her venomous racist bullshit. Given how much influence she had over the eugenics programs, I’m of a mind that she ought to be right up there alongside Hitler and the Nazis in the pantheon of genocide.

                  What is really disturbing is the set of statistical facts about what Planned Parenthood and legalized abortion has done to the black community in the US–Per some of the projections I’ve seen, which are mathematically plausible, there’d be around 17-18% of the total US population that would be black today, absent legalized abortion. That is flatly mind-boggling, and really disturbing to know–Retail-level genocide, and done with the full cooperation of the victims. And, not as some unforeseen unintentional side-effect, either–Sanger planned for this outcome, and actively sought it throughout her life. Pure evil.

                  • ” We do not want word to go out that we want to exterminate the Negro population and the minister is the man who can straighten out that idea if it ever occurs to any of their more rebellious members.” Sanger

              • You flatter the Carthaginians. From a Roman writer:

                They [the Carthaginians] also alleged that Cronus had turned against them inasmuch as in former times they had been accustomed to sacrifice to this god the noblest of their sons, but more recently, secretly buying and nurturing children, they had sent these to the sacrifice; and when an investigation was made, some of those who had been sacrificed were discovered to have been supposititious.

                When they had given thought to these things and saw their enemy encamped before their walls, they were filled with superstitious dread, for they believed that they had neglected the honours of the gods that had been established by their fathers.

                In their zeal to make amends for their omission, they selected two hundred of the noblest children and sacrificed them publicly; and others who were under suspicion sacrificed themselves voluntarily, in number not less than three hundred. There was in their city a bronze image of Cronus, extending its hands, palms up and sloping toward the ground, so that each of the children when placed thereon rolled down and fell into a sort of gaping pit filled with fire.

                • For all of Carthage’s evil, the one thing that you have to admit is that they did (mostly) sacrifice their own; unlike, say, the Aztecs and our own modern-day equivalents like Sanger. She’d likely be horrified to learn just how many “women of quality” use Planned Parenthood’s services as retroactive birth control…

                • Call me unduly suspicious, but I am taking any Roman observations of Carthaginian character with several pinches of salt.

                  • I would too, but the archaeological finds tend to incline more towards a “The Romans probably exaggerated, as usual, but that’s still creepy” view of Carthaginian religion.

                • That statue sounds like Molech idols in Israel.

                  • Carthage was a Phoenician colony. Phoenicans were also known as Canaanites.

                    Yup. Same thing. (Which is another point of evidence. Both the Romans and the Israelites agreed about their religious practices.)

          • Oh yes. It’s a pervasive human trait to want to “sacrifice” others (or others’ goods, but that’s another post.) Self-sacrifice is an entirely different beast.

            • Which is, quite honestly, one of the things that makes Christianity and Judaism very, very different from other religions.

              Self-sacrifice is much more difficult.

              I remembered suddenly this story my mom was relating to me. During that horrible storm surge that swept away lots of fishing villages and drowned towns in the Philippines, a mother related how she had managed to get up into the rafters of their home with her children. Her oldest daughter must have lost her balance and fallen back in, but the mother had caught her by the hand and kept her from being swept away. The flow of water was so strong that she couldn’t easily pull her daughter back to safety however. The water also had lots of debris being swept along in it, and to her horror she saw her daughter impaled by broken pieces of wood, perhaps from the trees or other people’s homes.
              Dying, the daughter told her to let go, so her mother wouldn’t die and leave her siblings alone. The mother related how her daughter had loosened her grip…and to the sound of her daughter begging for her to let go, she did.

              I can’t imagine it.

        • Methinks these people are utter morons with no historical background whatsoever.
          Sadly, this is so very very true. But that’s ok! Because progressivism means history is irrelevant! Because “future arc of history” or some such! Woohoo!

          • Whenever I hear some pratt prattling about the “arc of History” my instinctive reaction is, “Get bent!”

    • From the beginning of my “conversion” to “neo-paganism” I have admitted openly that I was making it up as I went along. Taking pieces from here and there that I liked, and making up the rest out of whole cloth. I’m odd, and it was all about wanting (perhaps needing) a religion to help structure my personal moral beliefs. I was never able to find an existing religion that matched close enough. So, creating my own just seemed like the only option.

      I have gone back and forth on the idea of encouraging others to join my religion. A (very) few have asked me to write a book about it so that they would be able to better understand what my religion was offering. I’ve resisted that, since it just seems weird… like “go find your own way already!”

  14. I responded to your “what if we have been invaded by aliens” PJ post thusly:

    Practical suggestion: (1) Read “Screwtape Letters” by C.S. Lewis, and (2) Watch “They Live” by John Carpenter.

    Then think about the usefulness of maps – street map, topographical map, geological maps, etc. Look up “The map is not the territory” by Alfred Korzybski (general semantics). Yes, the map itself is not the reality, but it is useful for understanding reality and working within reality. It is a tool.

    My point is this: while some might say it is foolish to believe we have already been invaded by hostile (space) aliens, the concept that we have in fact been invaded by hostile aliens (or demons as per Screwtape) is a very useful map. It is fairly congruent with the reality that we observe. I refer to this concept as “the Lowerarchy” and have found the conceptualization to be quite effective.

    • What bothers me is Map Confusion. That is, one should not use a map of a minefield (where NOT to step) as a Dance Map (where TO step). And it seems this Map Confusion has become epidemic. As Ego Likeness (band) says, the(re)’s Demons in the DNA…. (tune: Devil’s in the Chemicals). People externalize things they’d like to believe are not internal.

  15. paladin3001

    Liger? Really? *tosses survey into the nearest blackhole….*

  16. I was under the impression that a Viking was a verb not a noun. Stupid phone would put a space between no matter what I did.

  17. Well, Scandinavian laws back then did give women more rights and privileges than they had in some societies, but we shouldn’t exaggerate things. Or the two women you mention shouldn’t have exaggerated things.

    I was on crutches for a while a few years ago from a sprained ankle, so you have my sympathies; please take care of yourself and don’t overstrain your ankle or any other parts.

    • Some of the women. Depending on who you married, or who your parents were. The servant wenches and slaves weren’t exactly better off than ones anywhere else.

      And it was for practical reasons, of course. Much more likely that the wife would faithfully look after the household when the master of it was off on trips trying to increase its wealth than some male relative or servant who might be far more tempted to try a hostile takeover in his absence.

  18. I’m going to guess that Liger is the “our answers didn’t really fit you, so we don’t know how to pidgeonhole you.”

    • I’m gonna guess that Liger is the “we know squat about magical critters or biology and are unaware that Ligers are actual animals “a hybrid cross between a male lion (Panthera leo) and a female tiger (Panthera tigris). … The liger is distinct from the similar hybrid tigon, and is the largest of all known extant felines.”
      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liger

      As with so very many web exercises, “Don’t know squat about what they’re speaking” is a reasonable default.

      • The Liger result does say at the end “(And you actually do exist!)”, so they’re at least aware that these are actual animals. Which makes their inclusion in the results so much more puzzling…

        Yes, I got the Liger result too. I think the “we don’t know how to pigeonhole you” theory is correct, since the Liger result also says “You are a [sic] unique and not afraid to be yourself.” Yes, incorrect grammar and all.

        • I don’t fit into any recognizable category, so they made one up to stuff me in? Hah!

        • thewerewife

          The liger is included in the results as a magical creature purely on account of a line in the movie Napoleon Dynamite. Napoleon draws a picture of what he says is a liger, “pretty much my favorite animal,” and explains that wizards use them in their magic. You probably get scored as one if that’s the movie you pick for your favorite in the quiz.

          • No. I have never watched the movie and did not pick it.

          • I also picked the movie and was still assigned “Dragon”. I don’t have the patience to try to figure out all the options; I’d like to think I should have been “griffin”, or something else entirely…

  19. I wish earth had been invaded by aliens, unfortunately for us tho, the people in charge are just regular neurotic middle class people who demand that society be re-organized around their whims and fancies.

    Upper middle class revolutionaries around world seem to inflict struggle sessions on their people – lenin, mussolini, franco, castro, mao – but there is only so much damage they can cause in healthy democracies.

  20. richardmcenroe

    Liger. Great minds think alike. Not sure what our excuse is.

  21. I am liger, hear me roar!

    (I’m also a bit loopy. I think I’ll take a nap before using the power tools.)

  22. Sorry about the ankle. Have been fighting plantar fasciitus for some weeks, which was getting better until I threw a minor weight over my shoulder on that side last night. Walking looking for a refrigerator today didn’t help, either.

    The test says I’m a Werewolf. Probably not the Wolfman Jack variety.

    • I’m doing the Pumphouse From Hell (actually had a couple of days in the ’80s; most of the time it’s been in the 90s), and was rigging a bridge over the water/power trench. Dropped one piece of structural tubing on the bridge of my foot. With help from the warfarin, I expect to have a technicolor foot for a while.

      On Plantar fasciitis, I got orthotics years ago. About 5 years ago, I got another pair and the doctor recommended stretches for the achillies tendon (there’s a connection; freezes up after a while, but it can be unstuck). I’ve been doing them relisiously 3x per day (takes 3 minutes when I do it “properly”, but the payback is the plantar fascia is pretty happy. First and second doctors never mentioned this, but the partner of Doctor #2 (Insert Doctor Who reference here) did, and it’s been well worth it.

      • er, :”religiously”. Too damned tired.

      • FWIW, the stretches recommended to me: Stand a “comfortable” distance from a wall/doorway.
        1) Keeping the right leg straight, step into the wall. (It shouldn’t hurt…). Hold for 10 seconds, go upright. Repeat 2 more times.
        2) Now, do the above, but bend the knee. The stretched foot should be straight forward in both cases. 2 more reps.
        3) Repeat the same set for the left leg.

        When I do it this way, it takes 3 minutes (10 sec stretch, 5 recovery). I do this 3 times a day. Took about 6 weeks to notice things improving (we have ground squirrels, and this started when I stepped in one covered by snow…

        There’s some stretches on the innerwebs, but this works for me. If I’m really pressed for time, I’ll hold 30 seconds (one rep per type per leg; 2 minutes to do it.) If it’s really a time pressure, I’ll do both feet at once. Get a lot of queries “are you having a heart attack?”, so I try to avoid this in crowds, or I look around like “I’m not really feeling ill, thank you.” 🙂

      • Have OTC orthotics for plantar fasciitis, and have been doing the stretching. Have had this before. It does help, it just takes time. It’s amazing how just a little more weight on that side set me back.

        Also changed shoes. Found some relatively inexpensive ones that also helped, which may indicate my old work shoes are past the expiration date. Steel toed, of course. After all these years, I don’t know if I can give up steel toed boots even when I retire.

        • I’ve had PF since the early ’90s. Convinced me to do bicycling for a few years, until life got in the way. The newer orthotics are a bit snug in the heel, so I usually wear the older ones. With the stretches, if I have to go without the orthotics for a few hours, it’s no problem.

          My steel-toed boots are 8″, and I found them a bit warm, so I’ve been cheating in the hot weather. Not sure that boots would have saved me, but I can take a hint. The bit that retirement means a life of leisure doesn’t apply to us; we’re pretty busy right now. Two more sheets of siding and I get to move to the roof framing. A chunk of indoor work for rafter prep; today is supposed to be 95 degrees or so.

  23. Pegged me as a Liger. Foo. The mythical creature I have been most often is a Werewolf. GM I was plating with wanted me to play a Ragabash in a White Wolf campaign. So I played it to the hilt and had a lot of fun. Tanglefoot Tricksters’ Son. He later added Haji and Spiritwalker. I took the advantage ‘Eidetic Memory’, and had a lot of fun with it, since I had an Eidetic in the family, and knew something about the condition (it isn’t all beer and skittles). I also took ‘natural channel’ and played Tanglefoot as a mystic who had to concentrate to NOT wander into the Spirit World. For along time my combat tactic of choice was to sneak up behind the enemy and the their shoelaces together.

    I miss Tanglefoot. When I moved away in ’98 I went to an area where, so far as I could determine, all the gamers were either focused on table gaming or Collectable Crds games like Magic. No good at either.

    *sigh*

    The world Tanglefoot was in was over the top weird because, among other things, the GM felt that anybody who belonged to any of the playable types (Vampire, Werewolf, Mage, Changeling, etc.) would have serious PTSD simply from finding out what they were, and so ALL the narratives about how the world supposedly worked was extremely suspect. For example, the Vampires firmly believed they ran things behind the scenes, but the numbers simply didn’t work (one Vamp per 50K human population). They were delusional. So was everyone else. Which works well in a multi-type campaign, since the various Creature ‘secret histories’ are mutually exclusive (or were).

  24. Very dubious indeed. I think I got the result Sarah should have had. Of all the things I might or could be, dragon seems rather unlikely.

  25. I’m appearantly a werewolf. Or at least some sort of wolf/crow monstrosity. Don’t hurt your ankle again trampling their goofy dreams about nordic Amazons!

  26. I’m evidently a werewolf.
    Howl.

  27. I seem to be a dragon. That wouldn’t have been my first guess.
    Then again, Nice Dragons Finish Last, or so the tale is told.

  28. I am a liger it seems. But then, I am also a Leo. (Keep smacking head on desk that this is all a bunch of fun hooey.) I was hoping I would be a dragon…now I am really confused.

  29. Werewolf. Put “loner” “nature” and suchlike pegs and toggles into the jumbly box, and thus wolf.

    At least I got the hairy bit right. *strokes beard that I’ve been meaning to shave off for over a year now*

  30. I’m a vampire?

    I really don’t think so.

  31. Werewolf. There seems to be a whole pack of us here.

  32. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  33. Our esteemed Hostess is a Liger, and has apparently produced viable offspring. Perhaps there is some supernaturality there after all.

    • Feather Blade

      It seems that Ligers aren’t actually sterile?

      Or maybe it was the Tigons that weren’t. Because I’ve seen (on TV!) cubs in zoos that were (according to the narration) produced by breeding a tiger and either a liger or tigon. Called them tiligons.

      And can I just say that those are really stupid names for crossbreeds?

  34. I am a unicorn …

    And a butterfly is not an animal, it is an insect. From Wiki:

    Butterflies are insects in the macrolepidopteran clade Rhopalocera from the order Lepidoptera, which also includes moths. Adult butterflies have large, often brightly coloured wings, and conspicuous, fluttering flight. The group comprises the large superfamily Papilionoidea, which contains at least one former group, the skippers (formerly the superfamily “Hesperioidea”) and the most recent analyses suggest it also contains the moth-butterflies (formerly the superfamily “Hedyloidea”). Butterfly fossils date to the Paleocene, which was about 56 million years ago.

  35. By the way Sarah, you got picked up by the biggest blog in Canada.

    http://www.smalldeadanimals.com/2017/07/james-carville.html#comments

    • I used to read Small Dead Animals all the time. 🙂

      • I’ve read the entrails of small dead animals …

        Their message was consistent: go throw up. Now.

        • There are hawks that live in the trees behind my house. They seem to like to sit and eat on the nice flat concrete expanses of my driveway or patio. So every so often on the driveway or patio, I’ll find the head of some small critter and a short distance away the rest of the critter, with chunks missing.

          Policing these up before the kids see them is sometimes difficult. And the time the hawks got a rabbit, under the tree that’s right outside my bedroom window, was ugly. That one required a shovel.

          • *grin* I found another puff of feathers in the back yard yesterday. Yet another dove has been raptored. I think I was 6 or 7 when Mom and Dad explained that animals die, and sometimes have to be killed (we were having a serious rabbit problem). I didn’t like it, but I understood that there was a difference between the rabbits that ate my strawberries and the neighbor’s show rabbits that I was allowed to pet and brush. But I was a touch Odd, and I did not have to see the remains. I found them once a hawk or dog got to them on occasion, but Dad tended to toss the carcasses over the back fence, were I was forbidden to go (had a five-ten foot span between the fence and a 30′ drop off into a creek-bed.)

  36. I’m conceiving of a story…
    oh, this is evil

    its about a group of humans resisting the global rule of a woman who has been taken over by an alien AI and doesn’t even realize it.

    :>

  37. Heh; there was an online test (I know not where) that asked what kind of military aircraft you were. I got E-6, the jammer aircraft based on the A-6 Navy jet from the sixties.

    • Patrick Chester

      There was an online test some years back that determined your preferred weapon. It went from melee weapons to firearms and heavier ordinance.

      I ended up with Orbital Laser.

      It fits, now that I think of it…

    • The EW version of the A-6 Intruder was the EA-6B Prowler. I thought the E-6 was a tweaked version of a Boeing 707-320…

      The EF-111 Raven was also called the Sparkvark. Which EW aircraft was dubbed “Queer”? Can’t remember.

  38. I ended up as a liger too. Magical?

  39. And Ace of Spades HQ had a link to Popular Mechanics which referred back to a video on Digg. Gentlebeings all, the ultimate SR-71 story: http://digg.com/video/la-speed-check-blackbird-story.

  40. Pingback: I’m cranky this Saturday, too – westfargomusings

  41. When forced, the closest I ever came to picking a Furry avatar was myself, as a Satyr.

  42. Mildly OT, but speaking of exposure to idiots while being cranky – I could not resist the urge myself. Just hammered another PJM columnist (and not one of the usual suspects) on his Amazon Derangement Syndrome rant – apparently the idiot thinks you have to buy everything there with a credit card; he’s never heard of a debit card. (Besides repeating many other falsehoods – sorry, but justified disgust at the antics of Bezos’s WaPo does not give you leave to do the same thing.)

    Ah well, good thing my crankiness is just at people thinking I can change my plans half a dozen times a day. If I had a sprained ankle, I’d have my grandfathers solid hickory Budweiser cane in hand, and be sorely tempted to poke people.

    Anyway, put the ankle up, with an icepack or two – the dust bunnies will still be there in a couple of days. Along with their progeny, of course…

  43. Okay… I’m related to Drak? Of course, maybe only distantly – there’s no continuation to find out just what kind of dragon I am. Such is rather important, I think.

    More random thoughts, might as well get them in on one comment.

    I will get around to yesterday’s snippet tomorrow. Assuming the plan does not get changed. Assuming also that you are interested in the thoughts of someone who doesn’t read snippets. I normally don’t, because then I am irritated at the delay while the whole thing is coming “soon.” This doesn’t sound like “soon,” so I’ll have forgotten enough to make it a brand new thing when I can buy the full package.

    Sprained ankles in the past, I have found that mild vibration eases the pain. So if Greebo-cat is amenable…

  44. I’m pretty cranky too this weekend. But that’s because my daughter’s dance studio instructor/owner can’t communicate worth a darn. For the 4th time within the last year something my daughter has been signed up for has been changed at the last minute. And since there was no one at the studio when my wife and daughter showed up on Tuesday, nor is the listed phone number active, and she didn’t respond to our email asking what was up with the scheduled event (but she did put out an email Wednesday morning about other classes) I left a post on her FB page pointing out some things. She finally responded back via email on Saturday morning. She’s upset with me for posting publicly on FB, I’m pissed at her for breaking my daughter’s heart once again.

  45. If you can get one of the inflatable casts, they work a treat if you don’t neglect RICE and anti-inflammatory meds.

  46. Projecting elaborate fantasies onto cultures too dead to defend themselves is hardly a pastime limited to the Progressives. Before the Rosetta Stone unlocked the written records of Ancient Egypt various groups, such as the Masons and the Rosicrucians, had a field day projecting their fantasies onto the Egyptians. Traces of this hang on in the culture, in the Mummy movies and the ‘Afrocentric’ assertion that Cleopatra was black. Hell, the Victorian British exaggerated the virtues of Rome (and then claimed they were similar), while almost obsessively studying Latin! They actually didn’t do too badly with their Colonialism, either, so maybe there is something to be said for this kind of fantasy.

    And don’t even get me started on the way Rousseau and his followers bent the reality of various Native American culture out of shape.

    • the Masons and the Rosicrucians, had a field day projecting their fantasies onto the Egyptians
      “Had”? They still do, despite evidence to the contrary.

  47. Turbo Beholder (@TBeholder)

    > There is an article on PJM

    You missed that they speak ridiculous pidgin wrestling with concepts basic to any known (human) language. :]

    As to the 3 last bullets – well, yeah. But it only need to be limited to self-inflicted only, and this will be the perfect set-up.