Years ago, when life had been an unremitting shower of cack, we’d take a day off and go to Denver and have dinner at Pete’s kitchen. This was known as “altering our luck.”
Perhaps it was the psycho-somatic effects, but usually afterwards things improved, stuff we’d long hoped for happened, and we felt better about life in general. Perhaps it was our perspective that had changed.
Now life hasn’t been that bad, but there have been aspects of it we’re been less than happy with. Mostly the fact that over the last 12 years I keep getting sick to the point that it finally stopped the writing (and the reading!) cold about two years ago.
Part of the decision to renew our vows before our assembled friends (and fandom) was to have that effect of shaking the dice cup and seeing if we could get a better combination. The other half was that we’d never had a wedding for US with OUR friends. Our first wedding (civil ceremony) was half a dozen people, at the York County court house. We spent the rest of the day helping my sister-in-law move.
Our wedding in Portugal, the religious ceremony, was massive. It was in fact too massive, including relatives who had flown in from across the world and whom I hadn’t seen in my cognizant life.
The end of it is that we never had a ceremony before our friends and the people who are in our life, more or less constantly.
So we decided we wanted one. We wanted one for our 25th, only, you know, as these things happen, we were so broke we didn’t even come to Liberty Con (where, in the age of the interwebs, we get the largest concentration of our friends.)
Which is why we decided to do it this year, even though with rent and mortgage we are ALSO broke. But it’s also because we’re taking the opportunity to fix the health issues we know about, and because the tenor of our life and family life is changing. We only have Robert with us another month or so, and his brother wants to move out when the house sells, which means we’re somewhere between a month and a year (we don’t know when the house will sell) away from being empty nesters and completely rearranging the pattern of our lives.
And we wanted a promise to help us with it. One of the reasons I’ve always said marriage is different than living together is because a promise taken before the people who matter to you has weight and heft, and you’ll hesitate to break it. (Not that I wouldn’t, anyway, since oaths matter.)
Which brings us to–
Yesterday we renewed our vows before the assembled attendees of Liberty con who were here early and wanted to watch.
As usual, we had planned everything and had attendants… and then we forgot them. We shared a joint ceremony with Cedar Sanderson and Sanford Begley, who were not in fact renewing but doing this for the first time. And the whole thing took about 5 minutes.
In retrospect, the ceremony we came up with was very Libertarian, self-administered each of the couples speaking to each other. And then we leaped two by two over a replica of Lady Vivamus, from Glory Road.
At the last minute Cedar changed her dress to green, which means that together we were Christmas, not patriotic, but we had red and white and blue bouquets (thank you Toni Weisskopf) so it still counts as the first ever Usaian wedding. I think.
I’m assured the dress of provocation was all that. I might put it back on for the reception today at 8 pm. If you’re around Liberty con walk down the party room hallway (room 10 something) and you’ll find us.
And let’s hope that the shake of the dice cup works, and the next few years everything comes up right, or at least better. Let’s hope this is a good omen as we enter a new phase in our lives. Let’s hope it is, at least, no worse.
Dum Vivimus Vivamus.