Ladies and gentlemen, Phoenixes and Pegasi, and the odd alien this is your captain speaking. We’ve been over some turbulence lately, and I’ve not been handling it with my normal grace and aplomb, (for a blind elephant) so I thought it was high time you knew what was happening here up front in the flight deck.
If you’re a regular you know I used to do state of the writer fairly regularly, but there seem to have been some other things to talk about, recently, and besides I didn’t like the state of the writer and didn’t want to feel I was whining.
So, last December I had a biopsy I was told was negative. That was true but it wasn’t PRECISELY true. There is a growth and also some free floating suspicious cells. I found this out early January, right after we’d decided to rent a house and move so we could clean/repair the other house for sale. That way we could remove from the house with the cats, leaving one guy behind to look after that house.
That was okay (I thought) because the surgery was set for March 16th. Plenty of time to get the house ready. Mistakes were made. It’s taking much longer than I thought, partly because I’ve been sick so much the last three years that things have gotten shoved willy nilly in places and they’re neither obviously throw away or keep. To make things slower I can’t drive and haven’t been able to for about 6 months because the hormonal stuff keeps switching my astigmatism. (I had to drive a few blocks the other day and parked cars all seem to be starting and coming at me. That sort of thing.) This means I have to wait for the guys to take me over/fit their schedule which means my maximum work at that house is about 4 to 5 hours and not everyday.
This is okay, as I apparently also forgot I wasn’t twenty and that nights with cramps (one of the side effects of my little friend) leave me beat. So four to five hours violent physical work is about all I can take at any one time.
This is not a long sustained whine, precisely. Stuff has got done, and it will probably take another month till the house is for sale. I don’t like it, but that’s the way the cookie crumbles. The guys will have to do a bunch while I’m laid up and recovering.
Things we simply don’t know: How long recovery will take.
This is a biggie, but I’m trying to do MY PART at the house (did you know I’m a fabric hoarder? I know you’re shocked. I used to sew both clothes and stuffed animals, and since I’m cheap I grab stuff at garage sales. Continued buying for three years of being sick. Yikes. I shall donate about half, because I don’t think I’ll have time to sew much while getting back to writing) so that the guys can empty it in my absence. Then only painting remains. I’m counting on two weeks before I can paint. I might be dreaming, who knows.
If there’s more than I was told so far. No one knows. Will go to pathologist. I need some steady prayers and good thoughts because good Lord, I don’t have time for chemo.
Things we know: I have had very odd reactions to anesthesia. So have Older son and my mom.
This is actually my biggest fear coupled with the fact I LOATHE anesthesia because I don’t like not being “at home” in my mind.
The hormonal madness likely had something to do with my problems concentrating to write the last couple years.
Where the Writing is: The damn book finally wants to pour out, but I’ve been working at the other house till too tired to THINK. The revision is done and I’m entering changes/adjusting, and have… 4? 5 chapters left to write. Yes, will try to finish before surgery, though it might not happen, depending. One thing I underestimated was the amount of pre-op.
Where the Sarah is: Terrified while knowing it’s stupid to be terrified. Making preparations in case I’m not here after Tuesday, even though I know that’s unlikely.
Where the blog will be: I have guest posts for a week. I’d like to have them for two. While serious complications are unlikely I have the body from h*ll and well, after both births there were weird complications, minor in younger son’s case, but consuming three weeks in older. (And also keeping me on morphine the first week at home, which is my excuse for writing Thirst.) So if you ever wished to see your name in lights on your very own ATH post, this is your chance! I have to have them by Sunday night, though, when I’ll be cueing them all.
I likely won’t be in comment section Monday, unless things go extraordinarily well, and I have my tablet at the hospital.
I probably won’t be in on Tuesday which will be my first day back home.
I don’t know how much I’ll be doing here that first week, but I likely will check in now and then.
I’m not being unspeakably lazy, I’m just going to be doped. If mind is working, plans are to do whatever else I need to get Through Fire off my hands and work on Darkship Revenge and/or dragons depending on mind.
Amanda Green, Cedar Sanderson and Kate Paulk should know how the surgery went, though not the aftermath, yet. So if you need to know, contact them. Likely David Pascoe and Tedd Speaker to lab animals as well.
At least until I can stumble here and tell you. My husband will post updates on his FB page. Because of the way my page is setup he can’t post on mine. He’ll also post in the diner on FB.
Should the unspeakable happen, (and yes, I know it’s unlikely) be aware that you, the regulars here and my much abused subscribers, were a great help particularly through these difficult two years, and that I’m not sure I could have continued functioning without your help. I love you guys, and I think you know it. You’re kin, every fractious, prickly one of you.
Okay — end of the soft stuff. I hope you guys will understand if I’m a little testier than usual and not hold it against me.
I will still be posting through Sunday.
No reason to panic. This blog will now resume its flight path. If you look to the right you’ll see a panicked writer caffeinating in order to write, so she can go to the other house this afternoon.
If you look to your left, you’ll see panicked fleeing cat, which means I need to go see what he just did in Robert’s office.