
Fractions vs Integers – a guest post by Maryh10000
Lots of highly sensitive, averagely masculine boys and men believe they’re feminine. Let’s be clear: sensitive ≠ feminine. – detrans male
Men and women, girls and boys, are being alienated from their bodies. There are many aspects of this. One of them has to do with how we talk about the differences between the sexes.
There are, in fact, meaningful differences between men and women. While they vary on the individual level, in the aggregate they result in traits that we tend to assign to the categories of “masculine” and “feminine.” These aggregate traits, correctly defined, are real. [I specify “correctly defined,” because sometimes a society will define a trait as masculine or feminine that is directly contrary to actual aggregate differences.]
The idea that the body does not matter, applied to sex-based differences, is highly alienating, to both men and women. In the case of men, it leads to the male sex drive and male strength being demonized and blamed for all the evil in the world. In the case of women, it leads to the female drive to be protected (which is what hypergamy really is) being seen as a sign of inferiority and weakness, rather than the natural result of her vulnerability in pregnancy and caring for small children. The male differences make them the oppressors, the female differences make them the oppressed.
Listing out the different aggregate traits of men and women has long included assigning a hierarchical value to them. Plato could envision woman being equal to man, but only to the extent she was separated from her “inferior” body. This is feminist egalitarianism, being played out to its logical conclusion in the trans not-allowed-to-debate.
Aristotle insisted that embodiment mattered, and that this meant women were inferior to men. This is the “polarized” explanation of the aggregate traits. Men have the “positive” traits and women have the “inferior” traits.
Judeo-Christianity insisted that women and men were equally divine image bearers, agreeing with Plato that they were equal in dignity. But it also insisted, with Aristotle, that embodiment was an essential element to being human. So how do we reconcile equal dignity with meaningful difference?
Hildegard von Bingen, in the twelfth century, introduced the idea of complementarity. Men and women are both different, and at the same time still equal in dignity. But her mystical vision of the universe in not a hierarchy but an egg with interconnected, nested layers. While she still assigns traits to male and female, she imagines them as virtues, that are applicable to both. “Mercy” is a female virtue, that nevertheless should also be developed by men. “Courage” is a male virtue, that women should also seek to cultivate.
This viewpoint is probably what most western people think of when they consider “women’s rights” and “women’s equality.” Note that this is not a disembodied viewpoint, nor does it cast men and women in a necessarily oppressor / oppressed relationship, as feminism does, and has done, at least since the adoption of the term “feminism.” The oppressor / oppressed terminology of feminism, which came from Marxism, has poisoned the expansion of all human rights made possible by the incredible increase of wealth caused by the industrial revolution.
At one point, I thought this was a sufficient, non-antagonistic way to look at male and female aggregate differences. Unfortunately, rather than seeing “masculine” and “feminine” simply as ways to view the different ways that men and women can exist in the world, it has been co-opted, once again, by disembodied egalitarianism. And once again, it is the specifically female ability to bear young that must be erased, as in Plato. Once again, the female is the inferior to the male because her ability to give birth makes her vulnerable, although this time her inferiority is based on a world that sees the only real virtue as power.
So is there a way to look at complementarity that restores meaningful difference without sacrificing equal dignity, or forcing individuals to see any deviation from the aggregate as a kind of “failure” of a male or female body?
Fractional complementarity answers the problem by assigning the aggregate differences to men and women, who are not seen as “complete” in themselves, but as “completed by” the other sex. One of the problems with this is that in a society that sees all relationships solely in terms of power, this easily breaks down into a polarized value hierarchy. And it still defines whatever aggregate traits an individual has of the other sex as being, at least theoretically, at odds with his or her body.
Integral complementarity answers the problem by not assigning the aggregate differences to “masculine” and “feminine” at all, but rather by using them to describe what it means to be embodied as a male or female image of God. In this view, “mercy” is not an aggregate “feminine” trait, and a woman who displays “courage” is not being “masculine.”
Sensitive does not equal feminine.
Fractional complementarity sees men and women as incomplete, and through their complementarity, they become complete.
½ + ½ = 1.
Integral complementarity sees each man and each woman as a whole person, not fractional parts. Their difference is not just complementary but fruitful. Their collaboration can create a child, but it can also foster new life in any number of areas: intellectual, spiritual, artistic, and so on.
1 + 1 = 3.
So what are the “meaningful differences”, if they are not defined by a list of aggregate traits?
The “meaningful differences” are defined by the “male genius” and the “female genius” which derive directly from the biological reality that male and female bodies are oriented to creating and raising children. This can then be expanded to the care and protection of the weak and vulnerable wherever they exist, not just to children.
First, let’s look at the male genius, since the male sex drive and male strength have been so demonized. Abigail Favale summarizes John Paul like this:
“The male body carries the potential to engender life without; like St. Joseph, he must make a willful act to accept and protect the mother and the child, even at cost to himself; he must choose to cross the distance that lies between himself and the vulnerable other, to reach out in love.”
This is what the male sex drive is for. This is what male strength is for. It helps the man to choose to “cross the distance … between himself and the vulnerable other … in love”
This particular requirement leads to various aggregate traits that are seen more often in men than in women. But it is not those aggregate traits that make him masculine. Living out the male genius in his male body is what makes him masculine.
Now let’s look at the female genius. Favale summarizes John Paul on the female genius in a familiar way:
“The female body is designed with an inherent potential to engender new life within; the human person has been entrusted to woman in a uniquely intimate and immediate way. Her genius is to be particularly attentive to the human person in whatever her realm of influence.”
I will relate this directly to hypergamy, or the search for a protector. Because she creates the child from her own flesh and blood, she becomes less able to provide for and protect herself. Creating and caring for the vulnerable child makes her vulnerable herself. To attend to it, she must choose to put her life under the protection of the other.
Again, this necessarily leads to various aggregate traits which are seen more often in women than men. But it is not those traits that make her feminine. Living out the female genius in her female body is what makes her feminine.
It is most clear to see the masculine and feminine genius played out in the creation and raising of children. The man, by virtue of the very way his body is built, must look outward, to the other, to create and then protect the vulnerable child. The woman, who literally creates the vulnerable child out of her own flesh and blood, must choose to make herself vulnerable to attend to the child.
It is clear that the vast majority of occupations and traits in the modern world can be conducive to both the masculine and the feminine genius, even where they are not generally preferred by one sex or the other. While aggregate traits may be more common in men or women, they are only incidentally present in any particular embodied man and woman.
Quotes are from:
Note: Unfortunately, the term “feminist” is used today both by people who advocate for human rights, including women’s rights, and those who take the Marxist view that pits male oppressors against the female oppressed. So while I’m not a feminist, I don’t automatically discount those who do call themselves feminists. I would like to point out, however, that most of the TERFs fighting against trans’ing children are still feminists in the Marxist sense, although they would not be likely to recognize that. They still present the essential “trans” problem as “men attacking women” and have not recognized the impact of feminism in alienating both boys and girls from their bodies.



















































































