126 thoughts on “FOLLOW THE LAUGHING MEME ROAD”

    3. It is. One is for “small pan I use every day” then there’s “slow cooking in stew pot” and “beans burner.” And the front right is always where the kettle or teapot live.

      Liked by 1 person

    5. Well, one’s for little things. Single omlettes, water for tea, that sort of thing. Next size up is for cast iron skillet duty- fried rice, chicken, beef. The last two are big pot and little pot. Big pot is for company and chili. Little pot is for vegetable soup.

      When you’re single, only one of those will do 90% of all jobs. When there’s company or a company sized party of children, the whole kitchen gets a workout.

      Liked by 1 person

    3. Aaaand thanks to you all, and to listening to “King of Suede,” I have a really odd short story idea involving a possibly haunted discount clothier and an attempted robbery bubbling up in my head. Arrrrrrighhhhhh!

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        1. Obviously, we need responsible oak tree control, with a 10 acorn limit for each. Those fully automatic trees are too dangerous for non-LEO people to use.

          Liked by 1 person

            1. Also to be fair, if you’ve been hit by one of those acorns (I have, and the just-hired-a-month-ago cop who started the shooting apparently was), it REALLY HURTS.

              And if they fall on metal it can be incredibly loud.

              At least in local newscasts, the poor Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Department is doing the PR equivalent of facepalming, and noting they’ll be adding this to their training for new hires. Apparently a lot of cops from other parts of the country are unfamiliar with NW Florida’s aggressive live oaks.

              Unrelated, I feel the “A lot of Persians”, so much….

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              1. Locally and parts of CA, it is the Giant Sequoias, and Sugar Pine, cones.

                Giant Sequoias are small hard cones. Seriously hard, like golf balls, about the same size too. Falling 40 to 60 feet, and that is if the tree is planted in Eugene, the CA groves are taller, a cone makes an impact when it hits anything other than asphalt or cement. Won’t shatter hitting anything except hitting asphalt, might, maybe.

                Sugar Pine cones are not as hard, but they aren’t soft either. They are 18″ – 24″ long. These cones too make an impact, a serious dent, on anything the cone hits, even while shattering.

                Guess what squirrels do. They chew them off and drop the cones to the ground. Giant Sequoia cones don’t make much noise dropping and hitting the ground. Sugar Pine cones make a huge crashing sound when they shatter. We’ve seen the damage both can do.

                Liked by 1 person

      1. When I was a kid, tornado came close by our house, took out some of the neighbors, including a barn and injuring some cows.

        The sheriff came by to help put the animals down. Not only was this unnecessary, given the neighbors, but they were terrible at it – broadside mag dumps that largely only startled the poor critters. Family found out and gently asked them to find some other way to help, while counting out an equal number of rifle rounds to animals.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Reminds me of an incident a few years back when a cow got loose on a major traffic artery here in the Twin Cities. Highway Patrol arrived and determined that the best way to deal with the situation was to put the animal down. Video showed a Trooper walking about a quarter circle around the critter dumping a full mag into it. Cow just dumbly looked back at the Trooper, who proceded to reload his pistoland put about another half mag into the beast before it decided it had had enough and fell over.

          I tried to get a local publisher of targets to put out an ‘official State Patrol animal control’ target featuring a silhouette of a bovine with appropriate scoring rings, but I guess they didn’t appreciate my sense of humor.

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    1. There are a couple of rest stops along my regular drive where the DOT has decided LED streetlights in a near-ultra-violet blue are the best option.

      The paint on the curb glows, it’s like driving into a rave or laser-tag arena or something.

      Even just a brief rest stop is enough to give a body a headache and completely ruin night vision for several minutes.

      The best(?) part? They also put those bulbs in the overnight parking lot that the trucker use to rest.

      Hope they’ve all invested in a sleep-mask.

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      1. Even a few seconds of those blue-white headlights give me awful headaches. Sometimes I think my retinas have been burned. If I had to put up with streetlights in that frequency, I’d be reporting vandals for knocking out the lights every week or two.

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        1. I cannot recommend yellow headlight bulbs enough.

          It cuts a little bit of the glare from oncoming traffic’s blue headlights, and really reduces the glare of your own headlights on traffic signs.

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      2. We had pulled over to a rest stop somewhere outside of Barstow when the drugs began to take hold.
        “I’m feeling light headed, maybe you should drive.”
        Just then, the pavement started glowing.

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  10. Anyone living rent-free in my head is going to come out of the experience deeply scarred, terrified of odd noises, and will jump every time something scratches at the window or door. It’s a very dark, twisted place.

    Liked by 3 people

      1. I think A1 is actually British in origin. But yeah lack of refrigeration means either you’re eating salted (pork, cod, beef, etc) or meat that unless freshly slain is vaguely off. Winter tiime is all the root veggies you can eat (and nothing much green). Sauces (often called ketchups) help with that (maybe?). Heinz Tomato Ketchup is from about that period and was in a clear glass jar to show you just how healthy it was.

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        1. “Sauces (often called ketchups) help with that (maybe?).”

          That’s why sausage was invented. The herbs, spices, and smoking masked the flavor….

          Liked by 1 person

        2. There’s a meme around– has a “today I learned”.

          Picture of a head of garlic.

          Picture of one of those little chunks in garlic-paper from garlic.

          Has a big arrow “this is a clove of garlic.” Pointing at the little one.

          And a note at the bottom “Yes I am still going to cook like this is a clove of garlic.” Arrow and circle at the head of garlic.

          Liked by 3 people

  17. Did folks hear there was another major train wreck in East Palestine, Ohio?

    Biden should never have gone there to speak.

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    1. Did it make the mainstream news at all? As in, how hard did his team have to work to find someone local to welcome him?

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      1. “What would be a good time for Biden to visit?”
        “We’d love to have him next year, when he’s touring to sell his book.”
        I think that was the mayor. It took me a second and then I had trouble breathing….

        Liked by 1 person

      1. Gallon of milk.
        Eggs.
        Freedom seeds.
        Fuel for the helicopter.
        Signs for the tyrant flinging contest.
        New rope for the trebuchet.
        Pet toys for the Cthuloid (it’s still teething).
        Catnip (one pallet, each).
        Teleport batteries.
        Butter.
        Non GMO Ambrosia, black (aka coffee).

        Liked by 2 people

  19. I’ve seen several variants of the ‘I’ve lost my thesaurus, and don’t have much to say about it.’

    What I’d like to see, an editor trying to clean the ichor out of a bad fantasy draft, and the author protests, “I paid for the whole thesaurus, I’m gonna use the entire thesaurus”

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Glad to see some of the ones I scrounged up in other areas made the cut for this one, including inflation illustrated by Ms. Johnson and Ms. Sweeney. ;) Nothing pretty about the inflation we’re all dealing with, though, sadly.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Ah, I see. Of course they might end up with something like this instead:

        Amazon.com: COBI World of Warships HMS Warspite : Arts, Crafts & Sewing

        I do find it a bit funny that its under arts and crafts though. Guy version of knitting?

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      2. Like the “I want a dragon/unicorn…” bit
        Only to get told it’s impossible and ask for something else.
        And something like a sane government is asked for.
        “What color dragon/unicorn?”

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Which works until you receive the lawsuit alleging that they followed your instructions resulting in damage……..

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        2. Used to be called the “prudent man” rule. Would a prudent man (or woman) take this action?

          It’s no longer applied much in our courts.

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          1. One wonders if this may be related to the relative paucity of prudent men to be found in the court system. As in, no sane/prudent man would go there willingly save a saint. And given the demonstrable lack of said saints, the lack of prudent men in the courts is thusly explained.

            Liked by 1 person

  26. Burners….
    Rear right is for the kettle.
    Rear left is for the small frying pan.
    Front left is for the big frying pan or the big pot.
    Front right is when it’s time for the Rilly Beeg Stuff.

    There is a rear middle, but that’s “just” a warmer, yet sees more use than front right.

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  27. OMG. That meme of the woman with the sign. She’s on Linden Avenue in Dayton, on the corner by the overpass over Rt. 35. On the other side of the street behind her, you can see Mehaffies Pies, home of the famous gooseberry pies made only once a year.

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    1. Btw, David Mehaffie is one of the Jan 6 political prisoners. He was arraigned in 2021, sentenced to 14 months in 2023, and might possibly be released any day now. He’s part of the family that owned the bakery in the past, but no longer does.

      I did some searching, and apparently this woman has an alcohol monitor, not a house arrest monitor. She was a pro panhandler working a shift, and picked up at night by somebody running the panhandler business.

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  28. Just a couple more thoughts:

    Heavy artillery and emotions are not mutually exclusive. Heavy artillery can inspire a whole range of emotions, from a god-like sense of ultimate power for the crew, to abject terror for the poor schlubs with a world of hurt thundering down on their heads.

    How about a cute little lemur for ‘Reported Inflation’ and a silverback gorilla in full dominance display for ‘Actual Inflation’. ‘Cause when I see the hot chick in that picture, economics is not what I think of. :-P

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Reported inflation: guppy.
      Actual inflation: blue whale.

      Or you could go with cars. Or warships. Vegetables. Skinny people/obese people. Leetle cats/fat cats. The possibilities are nigh endless that I’ve seen.

      Liked by 1 person

  31. Regarding the “not a robot” musicality piece: It’s a trap!

    There is no passage therein where a decrescendo would not be heavy handed metaphor. It’s almost universally used that way anyway.

    Liked by 1 person

  33. That heavy artillery meme reminds me of a “Big Bopper” from the microgame RIVETS.

    (Bopper? Battle Oriented Pre-Programmed Eradicator Robots. And yes, it is an absurd wargame.)

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