I’m okay, truly, and I meant to post well before this. But Havelock cat, who is very pretty and extremely fluffy had a poo incident in the night. It got all over his fur and back legs. Being Havelock, cleaning himself the normal cat way never occurred to him, so he dragged his butt all over the laundry room, the kitchen, the breakfast nook, the rest of the downstairs floor, the stairs and our bedroom.
We’ve bathed him and will shave his butt when he dries. Right now we’re cleaning all the surfaces he got smeared. It’s amazing such a small cat could get all over most of the house’s flooring.
Yeah, I’m up to my ears in you know what and cleaning as fast as I can. As soon as I clean a place, we find another one ground into the carpet.
So, there probably will be no post other than this today.

My “Like” is for you being OK but not for the mess That Darn Cat made. :twisted:
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Aww, poor kitty. Poor Hoyts.
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OMG I’m so sorry. You have my sympathies.
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My kitten did that at 3am one weekday. Out went carpet and kitty, cleaning session and i had fo be up at 5 am for work, so not pleasant at all.
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Its a Poo-pocalypse!!!
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A-poo-calypso Meow.
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*snicker*
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Groooooaaaaaannnnnn.
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*tosses can of tuna in his general direction*
Sorry, I don’t have any carp. (And I’m not throwing that at someone, could maim them!)
Of course….Greeeeeboooooo……
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I can tune a piano, but cannot tune a fish.
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Havelock is the spitting image of one the cats that I had – named “Zeus” (don’t ask me why he got that name, the furthest thing from the god of thunder and lightning was he…).
We maybe had a few more incidents of this kind with him, as he apparently had a difficult birth, and was one of the clumsiest cats I have ever seen.
He did usually look a bit more repentant than Havelock does in that picture, though.
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Havey is mentally challenged.
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So was Zeus, I’m pretty sure. But a big, lovable lump of fur – especially as we lived in a drafty New Hampshire apartment at the time. Our feet never got cold.
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Quite unlike the character after which he is named.
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Yes. That was a misfiring on our part.
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No dingleberries!
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Well, [REDACTED].
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When you deal with pets & babies, you deal with, well, you know … Or “why I don’t have a Roomba vacuum.”
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Yes. I learned the hard way that even if you are home, a Roomba and a non-housebroken puppy don’t mix,
The carpet was easy enough to clean but I learned more about Roombas than I ever wanted to know.
Thank goodness for disposable gloves.
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Why, yes. Yes it was.
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I came here to say the same thing. Dang.
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Pretty $#!+ty kitty . . .
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What a catastrophe.
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I’ll show myself out.
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You wait for the hook like everybody else.
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Too late, the carp has already been launched on your co-ordinates, and is incoming in a ballistic arc from the trebuchet. You. sir, are going to be smacked with a carp for that statement. Be proud! And be assured you’re not going to be alone!
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As far as puns go, I’m afraid I used the Catshit 1 over on MGC when Kate’s cat weed the printer.
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A good joke is worth repeating . . . just not too often.
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And most of the jokes dropped here are worth beating to death.
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And I’m dead hoarse from doing so.
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Community Approved Response to Puns
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I dunno, I think this might rise to the level of cataclysm.
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Is that a freshly-washed culprit? He looks like he’s plotting revenge…
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I think that’s a stock picture for him– or he might just pose like that a lot.
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Nah. It’s an older picture. He’s hiding behind my monitor. We need to drag him out and shave him, but I’m exhausted.
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He got bathed. Despite hiding under my bed. With the help of younger son (yes, we got books out, will post that tomorrow.) he got cornered, shampooed and dried. He’s a fluffy and somewhat confused bunny now. He has not enough brain for revenge, honest.
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So, Havelock stirred up a sh**-storm, eh? Tell that cat he needs to only dedicate two of his remaining brain cells to growing fur, and put the third back into proper litterbox etiquette again!
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Checks list of why I don’t have pets. Yep. Variations of this theme are # 1 through #71.
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Different [redacted], different day. At least publishers cr@p is usually metaphorical.
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Thank heavens, or after all these years, I’d hardly move for it.
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Pssst. Check your in-box.
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purdy floof. obviously needz rubz.
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I’d offer to give him to you, but Dan loves him.
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Mine are enough of a handful (they are 13)
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He’s 10.
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well ,y larger cat has decided she doesnt like the sensitive stomach dry food i have been feeding her to reduce her tendency to barf daily, and she doesnt like the flavor of canned food she’s been eaitng for six months etc
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I had a dog who loved one flavor of dog food until he got tired of it. We ended up getting a couple of different flavors and alternating. He and his sister were finicky eaters to begin with, to the point where they’d refuse biscuits at the pet store.
The current pair just don’t care; if it’s dog food, they’ll eat it. (OTOH, one has a loose interpretation of “dog food”, so potty trips need an eagle eye and a fast scooper hand. Sigh.)
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Yeah, well, I can hardly blame Havelock for not clearing himself in the usual cat-way, but another alternative should have been sought out. (Umm, I think I got the last half of that in lecture form at work; something about water valves, I’m afraid.)
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And glad you’re okay.
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Why we don’t have cats on space stations?
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It was too hard to lure them onboard.
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Not as hard as getting a kitten out of an air vent.
(Not from experience, fortunately.)
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That’s easy – reverse the airflow and amp up the power, and he’ll said right on out!
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removed kittens from within wall (fortunately freshly drywalled so the screw-heads were easily found for backing out)
Oh, this was two separate times within hours of each other. The second got to floor level and got under a shower stall, requiring a fishing pole and string lasso to extract. The hole they fell through was blocked after the first one was heard to protest and was pulled out.
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I thought it was because in zero-g, cats never stop twisting around to orient themselves for the landing that isn’t coming.
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Because of the possibility of this?
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I just love Danny John-Jules (plays Cat). He’s also in Death in Paradise and still a win …
As for evolved felines, I don’t know. Uplifting them seems like a VERY bad idea even as much as I like cats.
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What a cat-ass-trophy! As the Jews say in Canada, “Voy, eh?”
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What a thing to wake up to just when you got to feeling better….
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Shit happens. Cats share it. We just formally named our new freeloading foundling “Poots.” https://scontent-dfw5-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/42210753_10217025775541669_3830935297013579776_n.jpg?_nc_cat=110&_nc_ht=scontent-dfw5-1.xx&oh=409b812be85fc7845212642365fbaf75&oe=5CA2603A
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Terribly sorry to hear Havelock has had issues and greatly hope he (and you all) recover soon. Certainly, attending to the needs of cats must take precedence to providing fodder to Hunkind.
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Mumble years ago, I had a couple of small dogs. One got sick and pooed the bed. When I got back with cleaning supplies, I saw that she had also pooed a rug. That I stepped on, and tracked throughout the house as I was getting supplies. Most of the rugs were salvageable. Sort of.
Now, I’m either barefoot or stockinged (totally a word), and our dogs GI incidents usually tend to run to upchuck. Relatively rare. At their ages it could be a Sirius situation.
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(Indiana Jones voice) “Cats. Why’d it have to be cats!”
We had a purebred Bengal female once, who announced her desire to be an outdoor only cat by peeing in the bed….while I was in it.
At least, that’s what we assumed she meant.
*sigh*
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-I was working a ren faire one year, and at the end of the season carefully washed, folded, and stashed my faire-only gear in a suitcase. Fat Cat had been Displeased with six repeated weekend absences; he clambered into the full suitcase, locked eyes with me, and peed in it.
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Sigh.
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We had a kitten do that once, not long after he’d been released from spare-room purgatory while accustoming the older cat to kittens. Spent the next two weeks living in the guest bathroom.
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“Nibbled to death by cats….”
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One of mine, years ago, was named Tahvo. Guy’s name, old one, and no longer hardly ever used. Even if the cat was female, but she kind of got stuck with that because it has become to mean somebody, shall we say, somewhat mentally challenged. A very mild word for that too, and I wouldn’t have wanted to insult the poor kitty too much – not that she would have got it, but anyway.
And she was also a cat who’d pee in places where she shouldn’t have. Especially once she got older. One thing was every bit of cloth and especially all plastic which fell on the floor. A plastic bag would fall off the table as I was putting the groceries in the fridge, and by the time I’d notice that you could be sure it would have a small puddle of cat pee on top of it. Same for all my clothes. I’d leave a sweater on a chair, it would drop on the floor, next stop a washing machine.
Was bit of a challenge living with her.
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It’s true!
Sarah’s okay with us!
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Last time I had that kind of mess, my little Foxy dog had pancreatitis– so it was mostly vomit. Thankfully it was a linoleum floor.
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Kili-cat now understands that when she feels hairballish, if she moves to a hard-surface floor to puke, she gets two small (anti-hairball) treats. If she hides under the bed, she doesn’t. When we first got her, she was intensely scared of being caught puking – I suspect she had a not-so-understanding owner before. But after a couple years of hearing the pre-hairball warmup horks, and gently but abruptly removing the cat from rug to tile, then giving her a couple treats before getting the paper towels and cleaner, she’s got the message.
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Yea that works. I’ve had to do that with Foxy– she used to lick her fur a lot… but since I started to take her to the groomer every month, she doesn’t hack as much.
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shaving his butt worked. That’s the good part.
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No wonder he’s puzzled: ” What’s that draft?”
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A little late, but I remembered that this is apropos: http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20060125#.XBAGDoZOk0P . Yeah, the authors on on the Left, but it’s a good story
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