A post by D’Artagnan Hoyt, the bestest cat in the world (Mommy says so.)
She doesn’t like it when I call her mommy. Says she’d remember if she’d given birth to me, which is silly, because I don’t remember being born, so no reason why she should. The thing is, I’m probably adopted, because I’m handsome and fuzzy and not a pink blob on two legs, like Mommy and Daddy and the sad, deformed bigger-kittens they have. But, you know, they’re still the only family I gots. And they feed me and pet me and younger deformed-giant-kitten lets me sleep in his bed at night, which is really warm.
So… to make a long story short, mommy says that no one even knows all the name she writes under, which comes prettilly from a woman who calls me D’Artagnan, Tagnan, Little Cat (which I’m not!) Pickle Jar, Sausage, Bah-Lamb and a dozen other things and expects me to remember them.
Anyway, her names so far are Sarah Hoyt and Sarah D’Almeida and Elise Hyatt and apparently for only one book (Plain Jane) a house name (Whatever that is) Laurien Gardner.
And, she says I should tell you about the books, so here goes:
My favorite is the shifter series (I read them after they go to bed. I mean, geesh, if Mommy found out I can read and write, she’d start dictating to me.)
Draw One In The Dark — adventures of a dragon boy and a cat girl, though what she wants with a lizard, is beyond me. There’s also a pearl. It’s very educational.
Gentleman Takes a Chance — more cat girl and dragon boy. Kyrie, the cat girl is really hot, though Mommy would probably glare at me for saying so.
Then is the Musketeer’s Mysteries series. These are out of print, Mommy says, which is not fair, since it’s all about the adventures of D’Artagnan who was named after me, and who solves mysteries with his three friends, Athos, Porthos and Aramis. I’d like to meet the cats they’re named after.
Then there’s Darkship Thieves, hopefully the first of a series, only I read this in manuscript form, since it only comes out January 5. It’s about this girl who goes to space and meets a guy with cat eyes. Two paws up. Recommended reading. Go buy it. I want to read more of these.
Then there is the Magical British Empire — Heart of light, Soul of Fire and Heart and Soul, only of course they don’t have any cats. They do however have dragons. I wonder what mommy thought she was doing there? No clue.
And then there’s Dipped, Stripped and Dead under Elise Hyatt. It’s about Fluffy. The second book will be about the cat Pythagoras. Comes out in April.
Also in April comes out No Other Will But His, which is about Kathryn Howard, wife of Henry VIII, but mom says there’s no cats in it, though Kathryn behaved a lot like a cat whatever that means.
And that’s it, and now I’m going to make Mommy give me kibble and pet me. This was exhausting.
According To Hoyt 