Check out my husband’s parallel entries at: http://danhoyt.livejournal.com/20149.html?view=18101#t18101
Mr. and Mrs. Gadge T. Wiggs
Elf Hollow
Dear mom and dad,
Boy, oh, boy, was today an exciting day. Since we are constrained to use a sleigh, I thought it was logical to start off with a family of Emperor penguins as sleigh pullers.
This, of course, involved designing a whole new set of harnesses, since penguins haven’t before been used to pull sleighs, magical or otherwise. I truly don’t know why, since they would seem to be the obvious choice.
Anyway — when we finally got off the ground, at just past noon, my assistant Boggs was complaining that it would make us late for lunch.
The good news is that the sleigh took off, if listing slightly to the side. In fact, it took off beautifully and at high speed, the temporometer clicking steadily backwards.
All was well until the penguins spotted some sea lions on the snow bank beneath. This must have cause some issues in their subconscious, because the sleigh spun around on itself very fast, in a corkscrew motion. It exhuded violet light and then…
Well, the penguins were scattered all over. We had to track them all down to make sure they were still alive, because FAUGH has a strict no-animal-injured policy. They all appear to be well, except number sixteen, whom we couldn’t locate at all. I can’t believe it is seriously injured, since the only problems found on the other penguins were an ability to do algebra and a tendency to buzz under an artificial light — injuries considered negligible by any animal organization.
Boggs insists that since we can’t garantee the penguins won’t see sea lions on their round the world trip, I must discard penguins as an idea. I did briefly consider using blinders to keep them calm, but given the vast quantity of animals in pens waiting their turns, I believe we’ll move on to something else.
Tomorrow — elephants.
Your son,
WW
According To Hoyt 